Page 29 of The Secrets of Ashmore Castle

He bowed. ‘You are right to remind me. Then, good night, ladies, good night, sweet ladies, good night, good night.’

When they had gone, Sebastian fetched the cigar case and proffered it to Giles. He refused. ‘I’ll have one of my own cigarettes.’

‘You don’t care for these?’ Sebastian asked, taking a long draw.

‘I haven’t developed the habit,’ Giles said.

‘You should do. A great deal of important talk goes on after the women leave. And fellows don’t warm to fellows who don’t share their customs.’

‘I don’t—’ Giles began, and stopped. He supposed that getting on with other ‘fellows’ of his uncle’s sort would assume an importance in his life it had never had before. He knew how to get on with academics; he had avoided the world of the landed gentry.

Sebastian examined him for a moment, then said, ‘Master of the house now, eh, Giles? Strange world for you, I suspect.’

Giles was startled. It was as if he had read his thought. ‘It – will take getting used to,’ he said.

‘For me, too,’ Sebastian said, smiling. ‘Having to remember to call you Stainton.’

‘My mother doesn’t remember. As often as not she calls me Ayton.’

‘Yes. Well, difficult business for her. Women don’t like to be widowed, you know. Interferes with their plans.’ Giles couldn’t think of a useful response to this statement, and kept silent. ‘Bound to wonder what’ll happen to her when you marry. House can’t have two mistresses, eh? You’ll be marrying soon, I imagine?’

‘I’ve taken some first steps,’ he said reluctantly. ‘Consulted my grandmother and aunt.’ Sebastian nodded. ‘I hadn’t thought there was any particular hurry,’ Giles went on, ‘but there are considerations … Some urgency to the matter has arisen.’

Sebastian was watching him closely. ‘Have you ever wondered why I’m not married?’

‘Er – no, I can’t say I ever have,’ Giles said, a little embarrassed.

‘I know what you’re thinking. But I wasn’t always queer old Uncle Sebastian frowsting by the fireside, you know. I was handsome enough when I was young, I had a comfortable house and a decent independence from my mother – there was no reason I shouldn’t marry.’ He examined the end of his cigar, decided the ash could hold on for a little longer, and went on. ‘In fact, my father – your great-grandfather – was quite anxious that I should marry. He already had a son to carry the title, of course, but wanted a little insurance. He even found the girl for me, decent family, decent dowry, the right shape for breeding.’

Giles looked up with a frown, and Sebastian said, ‘You don’t like that, I see. Customary or not. Well, neither did I. There was a young woman I had a fancy to. Lived in the next village. Daughter of a major in the Foot Guards. Hero of Sebastopol. No money, though. No name. M’father didn’t approve. Talked to me like a Dutch uncle. Imagine my dilemma. There was my duty on one side, and there was little Phyllis on the other. I hesitated. And while I was hesitating, she caught putrid fever and died.’

‘I’m sorry,’ said Giles, awkwardly. He was not used to such confidences.

‘So was I. Still am. I always blamed myself. If I’d married her and taken her away from the village, she wouldn’t have caught the fever. I see her eyes in my dreams. Reproaching me. They were grey, like rainy skies.’

‘So you never married.’ It was not a question, but a prompt.

‘Couldn’t do it,’ Sebastian said. ‘It seemed like a betrayal. In the end, it’s yourself you have to live with the longest.’

Giles sighed. ‘But, you see, it’s different for me. You weren’t the earl. I don’t see that I have any choice. My father—’

Sebastian tapped the ash off his cigar. ‘I’m well aware of the way the world goes. Your father was a perfectly normal beef-witted country man. But you are not in that mould. You have thoughts and feelings a fellow in your position can’t afford. As an outsider myself, I recognise it in you. You will not be happy doing what you don’t feel is right. And this – quest,’ he waved his hand to indicate that he knew it was not the right word, ‘makes you uncomfortable. I just mention, while there is time for you to change your mind.’

Giles thought for a long moment. ‘I’m afraid there isn’t. The time has run out.’

‘As bad as that, is it?’

‘Every bit as bad.’

‘Then, my boy, you must do your duty, but do it with a whole heart. Don’t repine. Don’t sulk—’

‘Sulk?’ Giles was indignant.

‘—or you will poison not only yourself but all those around you.’

Giles pressed his lips together, resisting. He did not like being told what to do. Sebastian looked at him cannily, knowing what was in his mind. You can lead a horse to water … he thought. Time to lighten the atmosphere.

‘One more piece of advice I must give you, Giles. About marriage. Something you may not have thought about, but it’s damned important.’