Page 88 of One Kind Hand

He sucked in a shuddery breath at her touch. “They pulled me out of the water immediately. They . . . they wouldn’t let me go back to my parents. They weren’t understanding that I wasn’t the driver. That I hadn’t been alone in the car. Those precious moments when I was trying to tell them my parents were still down there cost them their lives, Charlie. If I had tried harder when I was down there with them at the start . . .” His voice broke and he scrubbed a hand over his face.

“I could have saved them. Instead I thought about my own lungs and abandoned them. By the time they were pulled from the car underwater, they were both gone.” A tear fell and dotted the thigh of his jeans and he rubbed his eyes with his knuckles. “They’re not here today because of me. I’m responsible for their deaths.”

Charlie continued rubbing his back as she let his story cycle around in her head. “If I chopper someone to the hospital on a rescue,” she said gently, “am I responsible if they later die at the hospital?”

Austin turned his head to look at her, his eyes watery, his face tortured from unloading this story. “No. You were their ride. You did your part.”

“And you did your part that night, Austin. You saved who you could. Yourself.” She squeezed his upper arm when he opened his mouth to disagree. “Listen to me. Your lungs were only capable of so much. If you had stayed down there, fighting to free your parents, you could have died too.” She hated that idea. “Who knows how long it would have taken rescue crews to locate the car underwater? I’ve pulled cars from the water before. They drift, often straying from their point of entry enough to make recovery tricky. If I had been there that night, as part of the rescue team, I wouldn’t have let you go back in the water either. Were you injured?”

“Yeah. I’d cracked my head on the window and had a pretty sizable gash.” He used his fingers to part some of his thick hair at the crown of his head to reveal a hidden scar. “Needed stitches.”

“Even more reason why the rescue team didn’t want you to go back under. And you had the intent of going back for them. That says so much about your character, Austin.”

“Still,” he said. “I shouldn’t have left my parents. They wouldn’t have left me.”

That was probably true, but Charlie knew better than to agree. “Bottom line is you haven’t wasted a second of the life you were allowed to keep. Your parents were proud of you that night and every night since then, Austin.” She cupped his whiskered cheek. “I am so incredibly sorry this happened to you, and for your loss, and that I made you revisit it all by taking you so close to the water this morning.”

“My fault for not being open sooner.”

“I say we blame Cody because he led me to believe it was him or Janice, not you with the fear of water.”

“Okay, yeah. Let’s blame Cody. I pay him to take the blame.” He offered her a small smile that encouraged her. “Actually he was doing his job by not telling you it was me with the fear. He was protecting my image.”

When he pressed his hand to hers still on his cheek and closed his eyes, she knew the time for true comforting had come. He’d given her his explanation for his fear, he’d revealed the guilt he felt over his parents’ deaths, and hopefully she’d given him the green light to release that guilt. He’d been an eighteen-year-old kid, for fuck’s sake, not a comic book superhero.

Charlie leaned her forehead against his. “So we’re good? You and me?”

“If that story doesn’t make you think less of me, if you still want to be with me,” he said as he slid his hand to rest at the side of her neck, “then I’ll call it off with my sister-wife and be with you.”

“Asshole.” She punched him lightly in the arm, but she was happy he felt like busting her balls. That made it feel as if they’d shifted from super serious talk to something lighter.

Only she still had a mess with her parents going on.

Austin picked up on her thoughts because he ran his finger along her jaw. “Hey, you helped me more than you can know with my shit, by letting me dump it all out, by listening, by not judging,” he said. “Now it’s time for me to help you with your shit.” He leaned forward and dropped a kiss she didn’t have enough time to enjoy to her lips. “More of that later,” he promised, “but first, let’s go talk to the doctor and find somewhere wonderful for your mom.”

“Wonderful might be aiming out of our price range,” she said, rising from the couch when he did and taking his offered hand.

He paused, tugging her back when she’d headed for the staff room door. His blue gaze settled on hers and he tucked some of her hair behind her left ear. A few silent seconds passed then Austin folded her into a hug.

God, she loved being back there.

“I love you, Charlie,” Austin whispered into her ear. “I love you and I want to share everything with you, so wonderful is not out of the price range. Nothing is out of the price range.”

She craned her head back to look at him. “I love you too, Austin, but I can’t let you pay for—”

He shut her up with a deep kiss that effectively scrambled her brain and pulled the rip cord on her body.

“You can let me do anything I want for you,” he said. “And I want to do this. I couldn’t save my parents when they needed it, but I’m in a position now that I can help yours. Please let me.”

Charlie wrapped her arms around this fantastic man and squeezed. “You need to start accepting roles that show what a big heart you have, Austin Rayhill.”

“Nah. I’ll stick to fighting bad guys on the big screen,” he said, pressing a kiss to the tip of her nose, “and save my heart all for you.”

Chapter Sixteen

Telling Charlie about that night with his parents had turned Austin inside out, but he felt unburdened now. Allowing another human a glimpse into what had happened had lifted the shadows in his psyche. The fact that Charlie had been the one he’d confided in—and she hadn’t passed judgment—made it a more therapeutic experience. Now it was his turn to help her.

They sat in the doctor’s office, listening to the options for care facilities for Charlie’s mother and finally settled on one in Danton, not far from Maplehaven. It had a unit devoted to the care of ALS patients and was known nationwide for its programs.