Page 94 of Beauty

There’s a huff. It’s a laugh completely devoid of humor. “Ineed to take back about three minutes of my life.”

“Only three?”

Gillian moves to stand next to me. “I wouldn’t take back asecond of our time together. I wish we’d been able to flee the plane. I trulydo, but I wouldn’t have left without you. Never.”

That’s brutally obvious. “Yes, well, you did seek me outwith a plan in mind, didn’t you?”

“Don’t we all have plans? We all have hopes and ambitions.It doesn’t make us terrible. I wanted to find the woman who belonged to mybrothers. I wanted to unite our tribes,” Gillian explains.

That isn’t all she wanted. “You wanted power.”

Gillian’s jaw tightens, a sure sign she’s frustrated. “Ofcourse I wanted power. I still do. You know what it means to be a woman.Without power we have to rely on our men or our king, and Torin proves thatthis is not a good idea. Goddess, even my own father uses me as a bargaining tool,and I know for sure he loves me.”

I saw the way the vampire mercenary and his lieutenantstared at Gillian all the long trek through the woods. “It’s not so different,is it? You did the same to me. You walked into my father’s palace with theintention of either purchasing me or selling yourself.”

“Damn it, Bronwyn,” Gillian curses. “Why do you have to putit that way? It’s not the same. Not at all. I went to negotiate a marriagebetween the crowns. You knew you wouldn’t be allowed to marry as you liked,didn’t you? And my current situation is not at all like yours.”

“I don’t see how.” We were both basically sold.

“Because you’ve known them all of your life and they all ofyours. I did not consider it buying or selling you. I thought I was bringingyou home.” Gillian reaches out for a moment and then seems to think better ofit. She pulls back into herself. “Since my brothers could speak, they talkedabout their princess. I felt as though I knew you as a sister before I ever setfoot in the White Palace.”

“Then why didn’t you tell me?”

Gillian shakes her head, staring into the river. “Becauseyou were so lost after what happened and then you said something about theconnection being broken. You cried out at night that you couldn’t feel them,that your Dark Ones were gone. I thought my brothers were dead.”

Gillian thought Lach and Shim were dead? Those first fewmonths after Torin’s coup were a desperate time. I was dead inside. I searchedfor the connection but nothing came, as though a black space opened in thecenter of my being and something that was always filled was empty. I walkedaround, simply a body moving without any more purpose than to be alive.

What did Gillian go through? Cut off from her family andeverything she knew, she was the one who forced me to survive, finding tutorsso we could both learn the skills we needed. It would have been so much easierto escape the plane alone.

“Why did you stay?” I ask.

“Because I wasn’t sure at first,” Gillian replies after along pause. “I thought perhaps that the magic I used to bring you back cut theconnection. I used a white spell that drew energy from someone who cared aboutyou. I gave you a bit of my own life force. I’ll be honest, I was surprised itworked. I was desperate. I didn’t know what else to do. After a while, when theconnection didn’t return, I had to assume they were gone or something terriblehad happened. Then I decided I would honor my brothers. They would have wantedyou taken care of. And then somewhere between years two and three, I simplyloved you as a sister and would have done anything to protect you.”

I want to believe, but I can still hear those words Gilliansaid as Shim held me. “You certainly reverted to form the minute you realizedyour brothers were alive.”

“I’m not proud of that. I was so happy and I felt powerfulfor the first time in years. I’d succeeded. Bron, I had done the impossible. Ihad survived, and all I wanted was to celebrate that fact. You belong withthem. You have to know it.” Gillian speaks with the fervor of a true believer.

I shake my head. “I don’t know them. You don’t understandwhat it’s been like. You seem to think that I went into these dreams and Lachand Shim and I exchanged all sorts of information. We didn’t. They were dreams.I didn’t even know their names. I didn’t even understand they were real.”

“No, I don’t understand the connection. I don’t know how itworks. The way they explained it to me, they could hear and feel you clearly,but they didn’t think you always could hear them. That’s why you need the fullbond. You’re strong, Bron. You’re a strong bondmate. Roan says you glow morebrightly than any consort he’s ever seen. Maybe that means your powers tobridge them are stronger, too. So strong that they could feel you, be pulled toyou even across the planes. I don’t know. It doesn’t matter. What matters isthat they know you. They love you. You’re married. Accept it.”

Bitterness wells despite the fact that I’m already deeplyinvolved with them. “Yes, you should take your own advice. Accept it. You’repractically married, too.”

Gillian frowns and a weariness comes over her. “It’s noteven close to the same. They don’t know me. They simply want a consort tostrengthen them and elongate their life. I mean nothing to them. And I doubt Ishall be able to get away. I thought about trying to run.”

“Why don’t you?” If she’s truly miserable at the thought,then Gillian should run. She surely knows how to survive. She knows the planeand lived here for a long time.

Gillian looks back at the tree line. “I will never get thechance.”

I follow the line of her sight and there he is. Tall anddark, with broad shoulders and a brooding stare. He’s larger than his partner,though he’s the subordinate soldier. Harry Riley stands watch over histreasure. No. Gillian isn’t getting away. Not if Harry has anything to do withit.

“I heard them talking.” Gillian’s voice sounds hollow. “Theyintend to take shifts, and the other vampires have their orders. I am not to beallowed privacy. They must keep their eyes on me at all times. Roan told me hewon’t touch me until my father blesses the union, but he insists that it willhappen. I am going to ask my father to find them another consort. Surely therewill be more once the plane is open. If your brothers do their jobs, I can befree. Unseelies who can bond are rare. They would be happier with a Seeliemate.”

But the look on Harry’s face tells me he’s already investedin the one he has.

“Well, then, sister, if you manage to talk your father outof selling your body for his convenience, then you’ll be better off than me. Ihave no father to look out for me, and I doubt your father made a deal with mybrothers that didn’t include my marriage.”

“Gillian. It’s time to go back.” Roan comes out of thewoods, a frown on his face. “We have a long day tomorrow. Come back to bed.”