Page 92 of Stealing Tink

Because Venus needed protection.

And that’s what Phoenix was. A protector.

It was what her mother had always prized in her. Her willingness to stand up for those who could not stand up for themselves. Her strength and her boldness.

And then, one night, the thing Phoenix had stopped letting herself dream about had happened. Captain Nolan Astor had killed Vulcan.

Freed them.

Venus had been paralyzed, screaming, terrified of the bounty. Phoenix, naturally, had stayed with her. Tugged on her shoulders and tried and tried and tried to coax her friend into getting out of there.

Venus would not move. And in that moment, Phoenix had truly hated her.

They almost hadn’t made it out, except Wendy Darling had sent Captain Nolan back in.

The Nomad hadn’t taken them on as crew members, as Phoenix had hoped.

But that had been fine. Because they were free.

Except they weren’t.

Venus was too terrified of the postmortem bounty on their heads to get a job. Though Phoenix suspected there had been more to it than that.

But then the Nomad had ended up needing them. Phoenix hadn’t been particularly enticed. If she never felt that hum of power again, she would be content.

But Venus had begged. Why, Phoenix had no idea. Venus hated being invisible. Her only joy back when they had been at Vulcan’s was the attention of his visitors during their parties.

She needed to be special. Phoenix supposed that was why she hated Tink so much.

But then Venus died. The first time, at least. And Phoenix hadn’t known what to feel. There was nothing she could have done to save her. Part of her had felt guilty about it nonetheless. Felt that she should have gone down with Venus, died with her.

Except that wasn’t fair. It was Venus’s fault she had been captured.

The idea had warred within her.

Except Venus hadn’t been dead at all. She’d allowed Phoenix to sit with that guilt while she betrayed them behind her back.

And sure, Phoenix believed the Nomad when he said that Venus had planned on getting Phoenix out, when he told them their location.

But Phoenix knows deep down she never would have done the same to Venus. She never would have risked it.

The Company is not exactly known for keeping its bargains. Sure, they had kept Phoenix from harm that time.

But Phoenix knows why Venus had made the deal. It was to save her own skin. And though she didn’t want harm to come to Phoenix, she had risked it.

So yes, Phoenix does mourn her friend. But perhaps she does not mourn her friend as much as everyone thinks.

Lars is still chattering away next to her, unaware.

But Phoenix has slipped into a spiral, the bottom of which is a sharp hatred of herself.

“It is rather convenient that she’s dead,” says Lars. “She was the weak link of the group.”

Phoenix makes a noncommittal noise.

“You don’t want your power back,” says Lars. “I don’t blame you.”

Phoenix doesn’t bother to ask Lars how he knows.