Page 26 of A Laird and a Healer

The wagon trundled around, and eventually the Keep came into view again, brooding and sobering. She felt like a woman being led to the gallows. The clansmen and servants had gathered outside the entrance, forming a guard. They clapped their hands together as Ryan jumped out of the wagon.

He held out his hand, helping Caroline climb out. He gripped her hand tightly once again as they ventured into the Keep. There were raucous cheers and grand hoorays. The only solemn faces were her own, and her sisters’. Nessa and Tara were huddled together near the door. Caroline flashed them a glance, but she could not exchange any words.

“Ye make a fine bride, Caroline. I’m sure this wedding will be celebrated far and wide. I will come for yer later,” he said, his exit abrupt.

He snapped his fingers and a guard came to heel, leading her through the winding levels of the Keep until she was taken to a room. Again, it had no window. However, the furnishings were finer, with a bigger, more comfortable bed, as well as a wolfskin rug on the ground. A fire crackled in the hearth, the warmth spreading through the room.

“What am I supposed tae dae?” Caroline asked the guard before he departed.

“Wait,” was the gruff reply.

The door slammed shut, and a key turned loudly in the lock. She heard the guard clear his throat and take position next to the door. Caroline groaned and fell back onto the bed. She had assumed that either she would be with her sisters or Ryan, not left alone. She checked the room for avenues of escape, but there were none. There was nothing she could use as a weapon, either. Ryan was too canny for that.

The only way out would have been to fling herself on the fire and allow the flames to free her soul from her body. However, no matter how despairing her situation seemed, she was not going to allow it to come to this. She couldn’t protect her sisters from beyond the grave, after all.

Some time passed and the doors opened. Caroline pushed herself into a sitting position, expecting to find Ryan there. Instead, it was a maid who carried a tray of food.

“Yer wedding feast, my lady,” she said, bowing her head and placing the tray on the bed.

The plate was filled with roasted vegetables, meat dripping with a honey glaze, and thick bread. There were also slices of fragrant cheese, and biscuits dusted with sugar. A wooden mug came filled with wine.

She drank this first of all, enjoying the heady feeling that swam within. Her stomach growled and while she was loath to accept this gift from her husband, she wasn’t in a position to turn it down. She only hoped that Nessa and Tara were being fed just as well.

From the first time she had begun thinking about marriage, Caroline had never imagined her wedding day would be like this, spent in isolation. She had imagined her husband to be a strapping man, generous with his time and his affection, basking in the glory of their presence. She had wanted to look towards the future with bright eyes, to wonder at all the great things they might accomplish. Instead, she might as well have been peering into an endless void because there was no hope any longer.

She ate the food in a monotonous manner, for she feared she had disgraced her father’s memory. He had spoken so often about his pride regarding the clan, and as the eldest daughter, she was supposed to carry this responsibility with her. She was supposed to represent the clan’s interests and embody its virtues so that the Gilmour reputation would be enhanced. Instead, this marriage was the first strike against her clan.

It might well be a slow death, especially if a child was necessary. Her hand fell down to rest against her abdomen. Everything inside tightened as she considered the possibility of raising Ryan’s children. Would they be like their father, or would she be able to have sufficient influence to sway their character back to the light? It was all so terrible, and she feared that she would condemn the Highlands to be ruled by cruelty.

And it was her fault for doing something noble and selfless. Even now, even after all of this, she still could not imagine leaving Ryan to be stabbed in the back. Did that make her a naive fool? Was she wrong for trying to fill the world with such earnest intentions?

It wasn’t long before her plate had been emptied. She warmed herself by the fire and thought about the future. Her main agenda had to be Nessa and Tara’s safety. Ryan may not be amenable to suggestions at first, but she hoped that in time he would understand that it was in his best interest to placate her.

It wasn’t as though she were going to make any unreasonable demands. Just to ensure that her sisters were married to honorable people, strong men who could protect them from the new Laird of their clan. It was a shame in some ways that Ryan had not deemed it appropriate to conspire with them. There were moments when she believed there might have been some shred of commonality between them, but she had been mistaken. He was a selfish brute only concerned with satisfying his own desires, not caring about anyone else other than in how they could best serve his needs.

She heard heavy footsteps outside. The key turned in the lock. Ryan’s frame filled the door. He stepped inside the room and closed it behind him. He was still dressed in his wedding garb, the pleated kilt rippling as he walked.

“I see ye enjoyed yer dinner,” he said, immediately moving to the fire.

He stretched out his hands, warming them. He stood with his back to her. His broad shoulders were wide, the trunk of his body narrowing towards his hips. His tight shirt left little to the imagination, and when illuminated by the soft glow of the fire, the angles of his muscles seemed to come alive.

Caroline was perched on the edge of the bed and tried to avert her gaze, but there was some natural instinct that drew her towards the beautiful masculinity of this man. She wondered if it might have been better if he had been ugly, but he had been blessed with a savage purity that sparked something deep inside, something that lay beyond her reach. She would have ripped it out if she had been able to do so.

“I hope ye enjoyed yer day just as much. It’s the only wedding ye are gaeing tae hae. I heard that lasses tend tae dream of this day.”

“It was naething but a nightmare,” she replied.

Ryan angled his head, peering towards her over his shoulder.

“I’m sorry tae hear ye feel that way, lass.” His body turned with the rest of him, and he clasped his hands together in front of his stomach, tilting his head. “I suppose that means things can only improve from here. After all, we hae a lot tae accomplish taegether.”

“The only thing I want tae accomplish is keeping my sisters safe. Where are they?”

“Oh, dinnae ye fret, lass. They are fine. They’ve been fed and watered,” he chuckled darkly.

“I want tae see them.”

Ryan pursed his lips and clucked his tongue.