Page 49 of The Haunted Duke

“How could you do this?” Evander asked, heading toward the door. “I… I need to get out of here.”

“Evander, stop!” Jeremy pleaded, catching Evander’s arm just as he was about to reach for the door handle.

Evander turned, his nostrils flaring angrily as he looked down at Jeremy, who looked pale and wide-eyed with panicked fear.

“Let me explain,” Jeremy insisted, his hand tightening around Evander’s arm.

“Does Helena know about this?” Evander asked, his eyes flicking toward Jeremy’s valet. The young man was still trying to get dressed, but his hands were shaking so badly that he kept dropping his clothes.

“No one knows,” Jeremy replied. “Not even Damien. Especially not Grandmama. Such news would surely kill her.”

“Cancel the wedding,” Evander demanded. “I am not entirely aware of the specifics of your arrangement with Helena, but I know she deserves more than this.”

Jeremy let out a helpless laugh as he shook his head and clenched Evander’s arm tighter.

“I cannot do this. I promised Grandmama that I would marry,” Jeremy replied. “And Helena… She knows that marriage is naught but a play. She and I have an arrangement. We both need the protection of marriage for our own reasons. I for this, and hers I will not share as it is her business.”

Evander took a moment to rein in his wide array of emotions, then turned to Jeremy so they were face to face, a silent demand to keep talking was written on his features. Jeremy was at least good enough to keep Helena’s secrets her own, and for that, Evander was going to let him explain himself.

“Helena may not know about this particular part of my life, but she is still a very dear friend to me,” Jeremy explained. “We came to an agreement so that we would both have protection. And it is not as if the ability to have an affair is one-sided. If she wants to take a lover, she is more than welcome to, as long as she is discreet.”

“Oh, as you were?” Evander scoffed, his eyes darting back to Jeremy’s valet. “If someone else had walked in on you, what do you think would have happened? You would not only have ruined yourself but also Helena! Hell, you even risk your own life!”

Jeremy flinched as his face crumpled with regret.

“You have no idea what it is like,” he rasped, his voice raw with pain. “To constantly hide your true desires. To never be able to freely be with the one you want. All we have are these little moments of stolen pleasure, and even then, they are filled with the terror of being discovered.”

Evander struggled to swallow the lump of emotion that Jeremy’s words had formed in his throat, and he felt his anger fade away a little more.

“Yes, I do,” Evander said quietly. “I do know what this is like.” Jeremy looked at him, his brows tensing with curiosity.

“I have been in love with Helena for nearly four years now,” Evander confessed. Jeremy’s eyes widened, but he did not interrupt.

“We used to write one another letters. She does not know it was me. The night before I was going to tell her the truth, I was captured,” Evander went on.

Jeremy’s jaw dropped as he let go of Evander’s arm.

“Evander… Why did you not tell me before?” he asked.

Evander shook his head.

“Because even though I survived what these people did to me, I did not have the strength to reach out to her once I returned. I thought if I left her alone, my feelings would fade. But in a cruel twist of fate, it was she who became your betrothed. I cannot tell you what it was like. The day Damien and Adrian told me. It was almost worse than the torture I survived.”

Evander felt his tension-filled muscles relax as he finally made his confession.

“I tried to stay away from her these last few days,” he went on, feeling guilt slide into his chest. “I even spoke unkindly to her. Acted cruelly toward her. I tried to tell myself she was no longer mine. That she was yours…”

He looked up, meeting Jeremy’s eyes with a pleading look.

“I did all that because I truly thought you loved her, Jeremy, but if you do not… Please, let her go. Let her choose me. This is my second chance, and I will not allow myself to lose her a second time.”

Jeremy’s brows dipped as he pressed his lips together.

“And you are sure?” Jeremy asked. “You are sure that she will choose you?”

Evander’s heart fluttered at the question as he recalled what had just happened between him and Helena in the library.

“Yes,” Evander whispered.