Page 28 of Dreams and Reptiles

“What are your terms, Francis?” I slid my hands back around his waist, unable to resist his bare skin. It was taking all my willpower not to lean him backward and press kisses to his stomach, then follow the trail of silky dark hair below his navel. “What will make you feel better about this?”

“I… um.” He bit down on his lip and seemed to shrink. “Patience? I haven’t dated much. The scene in Silicon Valley is full of guys who are only looking for hookups because work comes first, and though I tend to end up the life of the party, I really like being home. Safe. I don’t know why I’m making such a big deal of this, but⁠—”

“Hey,” I said, brushing his hair back. “Make as big of a deal as you want. I’m glad you said something. We won’t do anything you’re not comfortable with, okay? The last thing I want to do is upset you.”

His eyes welled up, and he looked away to take a deep breath. “Good. Um… because something bad happened about a year ago, and try as I might to be over it, I’m not. So if you’re willing to deal with a recovering, semi-traumatized extrovert with introverted and OCD tendencies, I’d really like us to make this agreement. No sex until we’re both ready, and we decide before we’re in the heat of the moment.” He didn’t make eye contact until after he’d said all that.

His statement was so loaded that I took too long process, and to speak.

“It’s fine if you can’t.” He started to pull away.

I held him gently but firmly, so he’d know I was sincere.

“Francis, I’m all in. I’m just trying not to ask you a million questions. I hope you’ll tell me when you’re ready, because fuck, I want you. More than that, though, I want to be here for you.”

Without knowing it, Francis had just found my trigger. I wouldn’t walk away from him after he’d been so vulnerable with me. I took care of people. It was my calling, my occupation, and my purpose. If he’d let me, I’d be the one to care for him, although it was clear to me that Francis was also fiercely independent, which was an intoxicating combination I knew I wouldn’t even try to resist.

I could navigate his terms and offer support when he needed it. Letting him figure out this new life on his own two feet would be critical.

CHAPTER

SEVEN

Francis

Sitting there caged in Kendall’s arms, fury reared up inside of me. My former boss took so much away from me. I should be ready to go all in with this wonderful man in front of me, but instead, I was having to negotiate how to spend time with the first person to really see me in forever.

“Your terms are acceptable, Mr. Liang. I’d like an addendum, however.”

His words were playful, but the determined gleam in his eye let me know he was taking this gravely serious.

“Let’s hear your addendum.”

He nodded. “Sex doesn’t ever have to be on the table, and I’ll still want to spend time with you. At my age, you learn to recognize that good people don’t come along that often. Especially not good men who cook a mean fried rice dish, who can dance and paint and look this exceptional in a crop top. Not kind, funny, generous, sexy men who kiss like romance is the point, not the tool.”

He stepped back to give me some space, and I leaned forward, my weight on my hands on the counter.

“That was quite an addendum. Do you mind clarifying a few things?”

“Certainly.”

He backed farther away. I slid down from the counter. My cheeks and neck had the loveliest sting from his stubble. I wondered if it would be less if he shaved, though his coarse hair would likely do more damage freshly shaven than grown in the bit that it was. I loved it. Couldn’t wait to feel it all over, but that was not the point to this conversation.

“What do you mean by romance as the point and not the tool?” I asked him.

He leaned his hips against the counter across from me and crossed his arms over his chest. “Some people think romantic gestures are a means to an end. They view them as transactional. You do something romantic for your partner, and they give you something in return. Then there are those who expect the overtures and take them for granted.”

“That’s been your experience?” I asked. It was an interesting theory. I wanted to see where he went with it.

“It has. My take is that romance for romance’s sake is where the pleasure lies. Having a partner who brings you flowers, or in your case food, or who caresses your cheek or kisses you like they have nowhere else to be… all that is romance for romance’s sake. You fed me because it pleases you to see people eat your food, right?”

“Right.” Perhaps with his age and experience came a wiser perspective on how people treated their partners. I felt luckier than ever that this man wanted to spend time with me.

“And me coming over here with my wrench was simply me trying to help, not in hopes of getting in your pants.”

I barked out a laugh and then covered my mouth with a hand. “I mean, it works in porn.” I couldn’t help my saucy response, but he had to expect that from me by now.

He tucked his chin and raised an eyebrow at me. “I’m being serious, Francis.”