Page 71 of Downfall

A firefly.

He has a firefly tattoo right above his heart.

My fingers reach out before I can stop them, ghosting over the detailed ink.

“You’ve always been my light, Skylar, even when there was only darkness.” I look up, fresh tears flooding my eyes. “I thought I was protecting your light by letting you go, but it turns out I extinguished it. I did the one thing I vowed I never would. I hurt you.”

I shake my head, letting the tears fall freely now.

He holds out his wrist to me, the faded numbers covering his veins. “I’ve known since I was thirteen.”

He doesn’t have to say the rest. I know what he means when I look down at the tattoo and back up at him. It was his first one. He somehow convinced Ash to cut school one day during junior year and got it done at some place at the mall. I always thought the thirteen was for his lacrosse number.

He has not one, but two tattoos for me?

“Declan,” I whimper, but he puts a finger on my lips.

“You don’t have to say anything.”

So I don’t. Instead, I kiss him again, only this time I kiss the firefly tattoo, then every other one on his abdomen, before bringing his wrist up and pressing my lips to it. Then slowly, one by one, I remove each article of clothing I’m wearing until I’m standing in front of him completely bare.

With no preamble, he drops to his knees, circling my body with his arms. “I don’t deserve you,” he says, his voice low and muffled from my skin.

“Maybe not, but you can have me anyway.” I hook my pointer finger under his chin, dragging it upward. “Declan, I want you to have me.”

In a split second, he’s standing, hauling me up with him and gently tossing me on the couch. He lowers his pants and boxers, discarding them before he descends on me, peppering kisses along my jaw, my collarbone, down to my belly. His breathing accelerates as he positions himself at the apex of my thighs and slowly pushes inside me. The burn of the stretch is immediate. It’s been a while since I’ve had anyone inside of me, let alone someone his size, but I welcome the sting. It’s the good kind of pain, like the kiss of the sun or sore muscles after a long walk. I don’t merely tolerate it, I bask until it turns into more of a dull ache. Then it’s gone and there’s only pleasure, buzzing, frantic, intense.

“Is this okay?” he asks, and I realize he hasn’t even started moving yet. When I don’t immediately answer, he speaks again. “Skylar, please say something.”

“Yes. I’m okay. I’m just savoring the moment.”

He chuckles, low and deep, and I wish for a second that I could bottle the sound and let it out when this ends.

When I’m alone again.

“Fuck, I need to move, baby,” he says.

“Do it.”

He shifts his weight, repositioning himself before slamming back into me. “Fuck.”

His hands frame my face, and I wrap my legs around his waist as he continues to thrust. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to be back inside this tight pussy.” He thrusts again. “How long I’ve fucking ached for it.” Another thrust. “How hard I tried to remember what it felt like.”

Tears spring to my eyes as he pounds into me, his rhythm steady and relentless. “The memories didn’t do it justice. Nothing compares to being buried deep inside you, Firefly. Fucking nothing.”

I don’t know if it’s his words or the surge of pleasure coursing through my body, but it’s suddenly too much, too intense, too everything. Pushing against his chest, I turn over until I’m on my stomach, causing him to slip out. He doesn’t do anything, so I press my ass against him.

“Skylar…”

“I want to do it like this,” I pant.

His hands are warm as he rests them against my sides, gripping them before he drives his hips forward. He’s so much deeper at this angle, and I cry out at the new sensation. He continues the movement, sinking deeper with each thrust until I'm breathless. My inner walls tighten with my impending orgasm, which I know he can feel because he curses as he continues to slam into me.

I call out his name as the wave crests, ready for the fall but then…

“No no no.” He slows down. “Stay with me, baby. Don’t come yet.”

I grind my hips in frustration, arching back into him, but he holds me in place. “I need to see you. Please, Skylar. I don’t deserve it, but I need it.”