Page 74 of Sands of Atonement

God fucking damn it. I fucking hated him. Always had.

The meal continued, but I couldn’t stop my glare into the distance. I was losing. And I didn’t like losing something that was mine.

“Ezra, I’d appreciate your forgiveness for my sister’s actions. She is young and clearly was mistaken… with her attempts at… you and Casimir.” Kavid leaned toward Eshe and whispered something in her ear.

Eshe finally lifted her eyes to me, eyes gray and empty.

A heavy weight settled in my chest, and suddenly, the air was hard to breathe.

“I… I apologize for any discomfort I might have given you.” Her voice was quiet. She was too fucking quiet.

I wanted nothing more than to slit Kavid’s throat and make him choke on his own blood.

“I’ll be heading home tomorrow. With Eshe.”

I gave him a tight smile.

Kavid nodded his farewell and pulled Eshe from the table, who was either in complete shock or denial.

My foot began to tap against the tile persistently. “One last thing before you go, Kavid. I recommend that you travel on the east side of Tehara, head north to Brestan, then cut across.”

Kavid stopped in his tracks. He turned around with creased brows. “Why the hell would I do that? That would take us a month longer. And is it a coincidence that the western land near the water is exactly where I’d like to visit?” He scoffed, shaking his head. “I don’t think so.”

“It’s a recommendation. Be careful. Atrovians have been seen there. If you’d like to travel home safely, I’d advise you to take the longer route,” I said curtly.

Kavid continued his way out of the door, and Eshe followed a step behind.

My foot hadn’t stopped tapping against my marble floor.

My mind hadn’t stopped racing on how I would fix where my brother went wrong.

I heard Casimir’s audible swallow.

“You idiot.”

“I—I—didn’t realize this would happen!”

I let out a long and deep exhale.

“You’re obviously not going to let this happen, right?”

I sneered. “What? You don’t want Eshe?”

Casimir laughed humorlessly. “No, and you know why. She was never mine. I don’t like women who aren’t mine. I don’t like sharing.”

“Me neither.”

I continued staring at the door Kavid and Eshe had left.

Chapter 19

Eshe

The rocking of the palanquin made me dizzy, but at least I wasn’t walking through the desert, collecting blisters on my feet. The palanquin was large enough for me to lie in if I desired to. Instead, I peered through the sheer orange curtains and caught sight of the men who carried me. I saw Kavid ahead, strong and brave and everything I’d imagined Yonam to be as a Qahl. He barked orders for the caravan to halt for the evening and set up camp. We’d been traveling for six days, and the journey back home was taking longer than it typically would if we were heading there by horse. But Kavid insisted that I be carried traditionally in a palanquin, since it was only suitable for a princess. It was annoying… and it made me feel like a little girl again, but I didn’t argue.

I couldn’t argue about anything. Kavid wouldn’t hear my plea for my freedom of choice. For what father would have ultimately given me. Sure, I agreed to marry Casimir years ago, but things had changed. I wasn’t sixteen anymore. They clearly could continue peace without a marriage bridging the families together. I didn’t want to marry Casimir. I cared for him like a brother. Like Kavid!

Oh God.