Page 164 of Sands of Atonement

The rest of the day, I went over the plans for changing the laws, and we all placed a vote. Silas grabbed the tallied papers and went somewhere quiet to count. We cleared the space of the bodies, cleaned the walls, the stairs, and the floors. We burned the bodies out in the sands until they were ash in the wind.

There was a heaviness in the Atrove I’d never felt before. A loss of words for the men who betrayed us. The men I had all once considered family. It wasn’t just me, but every one of us.

A sadness snaked its way through.

When the sun was finally setting, the burning and burial of all the men, those who betrayed me and those who fought with me, were complete. I walked through the tunnels with Casimir limping slightly on his wrapped leg.

“I’m going to head back,” he said.

“I think that’s best.” I didn’t want my brother to be here any longer than he needed to be. He needed to heal. “Take whatever you need. Take care of Tehara. Norrah’s gone and… I made a promise to her and need to think of what my next plan will be.”

“Of course. I can stay⁠—”

“No.” I swallowed. “Tehara needs one of us.”

Casimir nodded and clapped a hand over my shoulder. “I love you.”

I pulled him into an embrace, letting a moment of relief wash over me. He was alive. Our foreheads connected as I muttered back, “I love you, brother.”

After we parted ways, my mind was tugged in Eshe’s direction toward my chamber. I walked through the dark tunnel by heart. No one went here. I had my own private tunnel with a private exit and entrance to the Atrove.

As I entered my chamber, I perceived an eerie sense of emptiness.

She left me.

She lied to me, and she left. And if I were a good man, I’d let her go.

But I wasn’t, nor did I want to be.

Chapter 41

Eshe

I didn’t have time to process what I had done to Targon when my mind was flooding with worry.

Norrah was taken. I had to find her, but by now she was well on her way to Brestan. I wasn’t sure if it was last night or days ago… And I had to see Kavid. I didn’t know exactly what I wanted from him, but something pulled me to him.

I could do this alone, but something inside me held me back.

The winds of the desert blew recklessly, snapping the scarf around my neck. The sun upon my bare face was everything I hadn’t realized I needed and more.

Inhaling, I smelled the faint, clean smell of powdered sand and limestone mountains.

The sun was about a couple of hours from setting. I needed to get away. I felt as if I were held inside the prison chamber for years, but really it was probably only days. I chuckled softly, thinking of how confined I had once felt in the ‘prison’ chambers at Tehara’s palace. That was nothing in comparison to the one at the bottom of the Atrove.

Not even the wind could carry my thoughts at this time, as they encircled my mind.

Thoughts of my family. Thoughts of Norrah and how she was doing right now. Thoughts of everyone I cared about… including Ezra.

I thought of where I began and where I’d ended up. Who would have known, all those months ago, I would have fought alongside Ezra against Salazar, who was really Targon, the old Atrovian leader, who happened to be my real father. I shook my head, still trying to make sense of it all. I expected to get my revenge, but not in this way. Not in this heart-wrenching, soul-crushing way.

I killed my own father, the father who had spent the most time with me. Who actually showed his love, even though it was through the disguise of a teacher. He loved me. And I, he.

It was strange. The murderer of my family had been living in my mind for the last eight years. And it turned out I had actually been living under his roof the whole time. I decided that I was no longer going to give him another moment of my life. Even if he were my blood father—I brushed a hand over my warm face—but he did this to himself. He chose to have an affair with my mother. He chose to kill her, and kill them, my family. He chose to take me away from my only surviving sibling. He chose to fight for the Atrove. He chose to go after Ezra. He chose to give up Norrah.

If that made me a cruel person, then so be it. I was selfish enough to care more about being at peace than being at war with myself.

Over my shoulder, the Atrove’s stony mountain rose behind me.