“Ew, don’t make it gross,” Dek scowled, coming to sit on my other side. His emo boy-band face brightened. “Although, I wouldn’t be opposed,” he said with a wicked grin, inciting a terrible throbbing in my clit.
I bit my lip and he tracked the movement intently.
A wayward thought rattled through my brain—more of a startling realisation, really. My nose scrunched, prompting three concerned faces all demanding I tell them what was wrong.
“I’m just not sure,” I began, my cheeks flushing, “that any of you have really considered the full scope of my current situation.”
Van frowned. “What do you mean?”
My face tilted skyward. “Lord give me strength,” I muttered before facing them again. “My circumstances haven’t changed since that night in the gym,” I murmured, hoping—nay, praying—that they could work it out without me having to spell it out.
Van was first to breathe a sigh of relief. Then Beck. Then my little emo boy.
“You mean, you and Taylor—” Dek started.
“No! Gods, no.” I didn’t even give him a chance to finish the question. “Eth made his way through the entire cohort of female recruits, as well as some of the males”—Dek made a peculiar face, like he wouldn’t be opposed to that either—interesting—“and I never wanted to become that final notch in his bedpost.”
“Good,” Beck grunted.
Van nodded, grinning deviously. “Agreed.”
Dek leaned in, kissing the side of my neck Randall hadn’t bitten and I shivered in response. “That means one of us gets to be your first,” he whispered in husky tones.
Van, more ballsy than I’d yet seen him, leaned in, bracing his arms on either side of my body. “And one of us gets to be your last.” His pale blue eyes stared right down into my soul. He didn’t push me, didn’t lean in any further, but I couldn’t bear the proximity.
To be so close, to be so wanted, I needed to let him know the feeling was mutual. He was my sunshine, after all. Without pausing to consider the ramifications of our captive audience, I grabbed either side of his face and dragged him down for a kiss.
I’d intended it to be sweet—tender, even—but the second our lips met, it was like that searing antidote all over again, only in my soul. Way down past all the things I kept hidden. Way below all the things I left unseen.
Van stumbled, falling on top of me and our kiss dissolved in laughter.
“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that,” he murmured, looking altogether too much like the heart-face emoji.
Gods help me, I was smitten. By all three of them.
“I don’t want to choose,” I confessed, averting my gaze. “I don’t want to be the reason you hate each other. I can’t choose between you—but that’s not fair, either.”
“Deadly, we just said you didn’t have to,” Dek assured me, swiping the backs of his fingers across my cheek before giving me a kiss of his own.
“But that’s not—I, uh—ugh!” I threw my hands in the air, unable to even articulate my biggest concern.
Beck’s grin grew slowly. “You mean you can’t choose between us on who gets to be first.”
Mortified, I nodded, squeezing my eyes closed.
“That’s okay, Ice Queen,” he whispered. “We already did rock paper scissors.”
My eyes snapped open. “You did not.”
He snorted, a sound echoed by the others. “No, we didn’t,” he laughed. “But we don’t need to, because tonight, you’re all mine.”
Eyes still wide as dinner plates, I flicked my gaze between them. While Beck looked cocky and assuming, Dek and Van didn’t look affronted. In fact, they kind of looked a little hungry.
“Can we—can we watch, though?” Dek dared ask with crimson-stained cheeks.
Can they—huh. Well. Why the hell not?
Unable to do anything else, I nodded.