Page 126 of Choosing Us

“We followed the leads to a building where the suspect was known to frequent and got lucky. He was inside, we called a tactical response team in, and in the process of apprehending him, he tried to make a break, and in the commotion of things, I fell.”

“Fell where?”

“Down a few stairs.”

“Harlow.”

“No, it was not a flight of stairs. Ryan, babe, I swear, I’m okay.” The emergency room nurse comes back in, and imaging must finally be ready for me. “I’ll call you as soon as I get my test results.”

“I’m waiting by the phone. I love you, Lo. I need you to be okay—you know that, right?”

“Of course. And I am okay. I love you. We will talk soon.” I exhale and pause before looking up. I shouldn’t be emotional over him caring so much, but it is still so novel in situations that it steals my breath and puts me directly in my feels.

“Okay, hon, we are going to get you down to x-ray to make sure that hip looks alright, but we need a quick pregnancy test before we do, all standard. You said you aren’t on birth control, right?” The matronly nurse moves with the efficiency that only comes with decades of experience.

“Right, my body doesn’t handle hormone birth control well, but I know the drill, and I’m sure it will be…” Oh.

Oh.

Oh, shit.

“What were you saying, dear?” The nurse holds out a cup for me to take in the attached bathroom. My eyes widen and she gives me a knowing look before slowly nodding. “Ah, I see. Well, let’s just take this test, and then we will go from there, alright?”

“Right, yes. I’m sure I just…” When was my last period?

I pull up the app I use to track my cycles, and sure enough, there is an alert at the top: If you still have not started your cycle, you may want to consider taking a pregnancy test. Our wedding was six weeks ago, and we always use protection, but my cycles can be inconsistent, especially during times of stress or exceptionally busy periods.

Like planning a wedding.

I use the bathroom to collect the sample then gnaw my bottom lip raw as I wait for the results from the dip stick test.

The second line shows up moments after the nurse lays the test stick down.

Pregnant.

I’m pregnant.

“I’m going to need to speak with the attending doctor about this test result. I’ll be right back.”

“Of course, could you … could you hand me the test before you go?” I ask her, feeling very exposed in this room at this moment by myself.

“Sure thing, hon. It’s going to be okay, alright?” She hands me the little white stick that just changed my entire world. “I’ll be back in a few.” She pats my shoulder as I stare at the faint little pink line.

Without thinking, I pull up Ryan’s contact, but this time, I call him on video. His gorgeous face fills the screen, and I can tell he’s sitting on the couch in our living room. “Hey, are you already done? That was quick. What was the verdict?”

I don’t trust myself to speak, so I slowly shake my head.

“Baby, it’s okay, whatever is going on, it’s okay.” Ryan gets up and starts moving around, and I know this man is about to drive himself to me.

I raise the test into view.

“What’s that?” Ryan squints to see the screen closer.

“It’s a pregnancy test.” My voice cracks and a sob nearly escapes.

“A … a pregnancy … Lo, baby, are you pregnant?” His face goes from concerned to overjoyed before the words are even out of his mouth.

I nod. “I—I … yes.”