Page 21 of The Bound Zodiac

A knock sounded at the door.

I didn’t move at first. Partly because I was still soaked from the shower, towel slowly losing the fight to gravity, but mostly because I was dead tired, and the pain in my arm hadn’t faded completely. But the knock came again.

Noodle flicked his tongue. ‘The beardy one stands outside.’

I wiped a droplet of water from my chin, rolled upright, and hooked the towel in place as I padded barefoot to the door. He was standing with hands shoved into the pockets of dark gray joggers, shoulders filling the entire goddamn doorway. The tight white t-shirt he wore stretched across his chest deliciously. His beard was trimmed, hair pulled back into a messy low bun.

The moment our eyes met, a weird electric thing crackled through the narrow space between us. Guilt radiated off of him. The circles under his pale blue eyes were purply, like bruises.

“Can I… come in?” His voice was a little rough.

I just stepped back and jerked my chin, too tired for anything else.

He brushed past me, not even trying to hide it when his gaze ran the length of me and landed on the angry red wound on my arm. I didn’t care. Not like I could hide much with a towel and wet hair.

Rowan headed straight for the window in the sitting room, setting his hands on his hips, the way guys did when they didn’t want to punch a wall but really, really wanted to. He stared out at the sprawl of the lawn, jaw tight, body humming with tightly leashed frustration.

“Do you want tea, coffee, or something stronger?”

He answered without turning. “If I said coffee, would I lose my British card?”

I snorted. “I may hold it over your head for a while.”

There was that ghost of a smile on his lips, the only sign he’d even heard me.

Five minutes later, I padded into the living room, two steaming mugs in hand. He’d moved away from the window, but hadn’t sat down. Just stood there, a little lost.

I motioned to the sofa with my chin. “Sit. You’re making me nervous.”

He took the mug, nodded his thanks, but didn’t drink.

I curled up in the opposite corner, one leg tucked under me, the other draped in artful towel-slippage.

There was a good thirty seconds of him staring into his mug, brain running a million miles an hour, mouth drawn tight with whatever he was chewing on. He set it down on the table, leaned forward, and dragged both hands over his face.

“I’m so fucking sorry, Jupiter.” He wouldn’t look at me. “There’s no excuse for what happened out there. I didn’t even think. I never considered that through the bond, you’d feel everything Percy felt. It was reckless, dangerous, and unforgivable.”

He squeezed his hands together, knuckles white. “There’s no acceptable reason I let myself lose control of my magic like that. Not around you.”

I didn’t say it was okay, because it wasn’t. Not even close. But I wasn’t going to pretend I couldn’t see what was happening.

I set my mug on the table. “It was a disaster,” I said, voice flat. “But let’s not pretend it was all you, Rowan. That situation was a powder keg from the jump. I’m honestly shocked it didn’t go worse.”

That made him look up, finally. “You’re not mad?”

“Oh, I’m pissed.” I managed a smile. “You guys should have known better, and I won’t pretend otherwise. We’re all adults here, and I just don’t understand why we can’t act like it. Myself included. This whole setup is volatile. Every attempt is going to be bumpy. We try, we fuck up, we learn, we do it differently next time. The only way through it is through. I’m not expecting perfection on the first try.”

Rowan’s thumb traced his lower lip, and it was an effort not to fixate on it. “You should expect perfection from me. I owe you that much.”

“You don’t owe me anything, actually.” I shrugged, adjusting the towel because it was slipping. “I’m not some special little snowflake that needs to be coddled by you big scary men. Trust me when I say I can handle myself.”

He huffed out a laugh, the sound shaky. “Yes, I’m beginning to understand that, I think. I don’t want to hurt you again. That matters more than anything. That means we’re going to have to present the shield merge to Nightfall. Sooner rather than later.”

“Yeah… I think today proved that. If they know for a fact that we’re going to become one shield, then maybe we can figure out a way to get everyone to cooperate.”

I was kidding myself and I knew it. But a girl could hope.

He watched my face, searching for… something. “How do you think they’ll take it?”