Page 23 of Hope and Hot Chocolate on Mistletoe Lane

‘Tough week?’ I asked as I drove us to the ice rink. I wondered whether she was nervous or not. She always seemed confident so it was hard to tell.

‘It’s been full-on. Coming back home and then throwing myself into the winter wonderland. Not to mention all the shit I left behind in the city.’

I wondered what the shit she referred to was. I thought she loved it in the city. Before I could answer, she continued her list.

‘And then had lunch with my mum…’

‘Dad said you came in. How did it go?’

‘She was annoyed at me saying I have always hated Christmas so why am I creating a winter wonderland, why did I offer to help decorate the café, and why won’t I come to the cottage and put up the Christmas tree with her? She was the one that made the two Christmases I was at home without Dad the most-un-festive ones ever. It’s no wonder I was put off the season. I just don’t think she gets how much him running off with my teacher changed everything. She mumbled something about forgiving her…’ She trailed off and looked out of the window.

‘You kept a lot from her,’ I said, thinking back.

Holly snapped her head round to look at me. ‘What do you mean?’

‘You didn’t tell her about how hard some of the kids at school were making things for you. All the taunts and the teasing and how upset it made you.’ Holly had said at the time that her mum didn’t seem to care that the town was gossiping about her dad leaving and didn’t ask Holly how she was feeling about it all and basically was acting like nothing had happened. So, Holly hadn’t told her what was going on. I had said she should but she had been adamant.

‘Surely she could see how bad I felt,’ Holly said.

There was that flash of stubbornness I remembered when we were younger. ‘Maybe you both hid things from each other,’ I suggested.

‘This is why I wanted to get away from Birchbrook – people think they know everything about you,’ she said, turning away from me again.

I knew she was trying to hurt me with that. I didn’t rise to it but turned the car CD player on. I had known Holly inside and out and she’d run away from me. God, I wished I hadn’t cared as much as I had about her.

After a few minutes, she broke the silence. ‘I can’t believe you still listen to this band.’

‘Nothing new sounds as good.’

‘Have you tried new things?’ she teased but her words stung a bit. I was a creature of habit even though I tried not to be.

‘I guess I know what I like,’ I replied, wishing I could change things but I always felt so stuck. Holly must think I was a loser for not doing something more with my life. This night was starting to feel like a bad idea.

We arrived at the ice rink, I picked up my skates and then we went inside. It was packed as it always was on a Saturday night but I liked the energy and buzz about the place.

‘Are you going to skate too?’ I asked. ‘Seeing as you think people should try new things?’ A low blow maybe but I was still bristling at how she thought I was stuck in the past.

‘No, I have some emails to send on my phone. I’ll see you after for that drink.’

I watched her wander over to the stands and sit down, pulling her phone out. With a sigh, I paid for a skating session then grabbed a locker to stow away my trainers and put on my skates. Then I headed for the ice. There was music on and lots of people having fun but it all faded into the background when I stepped onto the ice. I started to skate, whipping around the outside of the rink, avoiding those clinging to the barriers to glide smoothly around the arena, my mind clearing of all thoughts as I enjoyed the feeling; it was like flying on the ground.

But after a couple of laps, I found my thoughts creeping back in, which usually never happened. Well, it was just one thought.

Holly.

I risked a peek up at the viewing stands. Holly wasn’t looking down at her phone, but was watching me. I pretended not to see and carried on, taking a couple of sneaky checks to see she was still looking at me. I spun around to skate backwards, looking up and met her gaze. As I waved, she shook her head but she smiled and waved back. I wondered if her cheeks had turned pink again at me catching her watching. I had done that a few times when we were growing up too. I had liked her watching me skate. It had given me hope that she liked what she saw but I never had the guts to find out.

‘Paul!’

At the sound of my name, I looked over to the opposite side of the stands to see someone was beckoning me over. I skated to the side and realised who it was. ‘Hey, Rach,’ I said to my ex. Holly was right about the one downside of sticking around this town – you might see people you didn’t necessary want to. I was surprised too. She’d never offered to come to the rink when we were together. ‘How come you’re here?’ I asked. I’d seen her a few times on and off in the two years since we’d ended things and there had been one drunken kiss at last New Year’s but we hadn’t been in contact for months.

‘You look good out here. I’m with my nephew and niece. Want to get some food with us afterwards?’

‘I can’t tonight,’ I said. ‘My old friend is back in town.’ I gestured in Holly’s direction.

Rach looked and when she saw it was a woman, her eyes narrowed. ‘Why don’t I know her?’

‘She left Birchbrook when we were eighteen.’