Page 64 of Rush

“I’ve caught on to bits and pieces. I’m just not 100% sure why he kept you to himself in the apartment,” Emma says, her tone quiet, hesitant.

“A week ago, I found out Jameson was racing his Vegas. Isla and I went to Chicago to confirm it,” I start by telling them, watching the shock on each of their faces.

“That’s why the guys were flipping out that night,” Riley mutters.

I nod. “When we got back, Jameson was at my place, waiting for me. I let him explain why he was doing it. He makes good money from racing. He told me there are no safety concerns and he can walk away whenever he wants to. But he’s been using the money for his garage and helping his dad out. So I let it go.”

Glancing at all my friends, they’re all watching me, carefully, some confusion on their faces as well. I breathe deep before continuing. “Earlier this week, there was a situation at the garage, and Jameson left in a hurry. He forgot his wallet and asked me to bring it down for him when I left with Dylan. I thought it would be in his pants pocket, but when I went to look, he acted really weird. I was curious. I snooped and I found a list that I made when we were seniors in high school.”

Isla’s brow wrinkles adorably. “What kind of list?”

“My goals. It was stupid. I was just bored and was plotting everything I wanted to accomplish senior year. Then I started adding things for the future. My top college choices, getting a limo for my 21st, going to the beach before college started, my PWHL goal, marriage, winning the Walter Cup, and having a baby.”

“No.” Emma shakes her head, “Ohmygod! Is this going where I think it is?”

“Jameson has been using his race money to pay for my college. He helped me get in without my knowing.”

“You have a scholarship,” Riley says, her head tossed back in confusion.

“The Jameson Kane foundation scholarship, yes,” I mutter, my fingers going to my temples. Emma’s mouth drops open.

“My apartment also wasn’t luck of the draw for single moms,” I keep going. “My Jeep was not picked by my aunt as a gift. I own it outright. The limo Carter won for my birthday was set up by CB Auto. He also coordinated our senior trip with my aunt and paid for the Vrbo. He’s been crossing all these things off my list and I didn’t know it. We weren’t together and I never thought…am I stupid for not seeing it?”

“You’re in love with him, Sam.” Emma shakes her head. “Kane has always been there taking care of you. The guy used to stash your favorite candy in his locker. I remember what you two were like in high school.”

Riley glances between us, frowning. She moved our senior year to the elite private school. A move done by her boyfriend, then rival. His motives were eerily similar to Jameson’s. “You said baby?” She winces. “Please don’t tell me⁠—-”

“No!” I put my hand up to stop her from asking. My cheeks flame red. “No matter what, neither one of us regrets Dylan. I wouldn’t change what happened when it comes to her and neither would Jameson.”

The three of them grow quiet. When I can finally raise my head, I’m thankful they aren’t wearing matching masks of judgment. “It sounds stupid to say I’m mad at him, when all he’s done is make my dreams come true.”

“But he lied,” Isla adds.

“He was never planning to tell me. And the sad part is I don’t know if I’d have figured it out,” I respond, taking an Oreo from the middle of the table.

“I guess you could say he manipulated his way into your life,” Emma points out. My heart hammers in my chest.

“He never pushed me.” My eyes drop to my lap, and I wince. “Well, until this week, I guess. Locking me in the house and bringing all my things from the old apartment pushed me too far.”

Riley snorts. I look up at her again and she's smiling along with Emma and Isla. “Oh, Sammy.”

“What?” I glare at all three of them while they watch me expectantly.

“Every time we point out a flaw or huge red flag, you defend him.” Emma giggles.

Isla is laughing so hard she has to cover her mouth now. Riley points her finger at me. “Any other woman would be at the police station if her boyfriend locked her up against her will and she escaped. You’re describing it like a nuisance and asked for a girls’ night to vent.”

“We’ve all been there,” Emma tells me gently when tears form in my eyes.

Riley nods and moves to gather me in her arms. “These guys are stupid sometimes and make mistakes, but I’ve never doubted that Reign loves me. Sometimes to the point of obsession, but I know I’m safe. He’d never hurt me.”

“Everything I’ve seen about Jameson doesn’t point to being vindictive or controlling,” Isla says. “I may have dived deeper after our trip to Chicago. I asked my cousins to…anyway, we all agree the guy is crazy about you, Sam. He may have some neanderthal-like characteristics, but you’re all over his phone, his photos, every plan and step he’s made has been with you in mind.”

Tears slide down my cheeks and a sob escapes me. “Then why am I being this way? Why can’t I just accept that he loves me that much?” Emma and Isla both move in closer, until all three are curled around me.

“I don’t know, babe,” Riley mutters. “But I think he loves you enough to let you figure it out.”

“He’s been waiting for you, Sammy,” Emma whispers.