Page 43 of Rush

“I love you, Jameson.” Her voice grows lighter.

“I love you too.”

My arms tighten around her, holding on, willing time to move slowly until next weekend. I’ll make the trip, win the race, then hurry back to my girls. I hate that I have to be gone, but I want the cash. I’ve become greedy when it comes to taking care of Sam and Dylan. Providing for them comes as naturally as my heart beating.

“Sam,” I whisper, and she grunts in response. I smile against her shoulder. “What is your dream? Anything you could want. Is it the PWHL?”

“Umm.” She sighs and shifts in my hold. I roll onto my back and her head comes to lay on my chest with her arm across my waist. The whole time her eyes remain closed. She's already half asleep. “Yeah,” she finally mumbles. My heart races under her head. “It's my goal, but, being with you, Dylan…the future. That's my dream.”

We fall asleep this way, her body spread over mine. I hold her all night, thanking the universe that we made it back here and planning all the ways I can make sure it's permanent this time.

jameson

. . .

Las Vegas is the last place I want to be tonight. Nothing about the neon lights, the frantic and stable hum of energy in the air, or the arid heat is doing anything for me. Six months ago, this would be exciting. The thrill of the race looming ahead of me and shaking hands with key players whose money I’d be taking was something I always thrived on as it brought me closer to my end goal. Layering my pockets and padding my savings account for the future. A future with two beautiful girls, one who is chasing her dreams and the other who calls me daddy and insisted on painting my toes last week after hers were done. Of course, I let her try, and it was messy with more of the pink on my skin than the actual nail. Having to drive away from them and get on a plane and travel thousands of miles away is eating me alive.

“How are you holding up, man?” Luca walks up next to me, both of us surveying the Vegas Strip as the sun sinks behind the desert mountains.

I shake my head, my hands clenching at my sides. “Hate this. I could care less about the race or anyone who wants to talk to me about it tonight.”

Luca nods silently. I can feel his eyes glancing at me in the glass. “This went just fine two months ago.”

“Two months ago is like eons ago in my relationship with Sam. We're good right now. Solid. Probably the best we’ve ever been and I had to leave her bed to come here,” I tell him, my back molars grinding at the injustice I feel.

“I can’t say I get it, because I don’t have a woman where I have something like that with.” Luca sighs and crosses his arms over his chest. “But if I did, I would hope that one of you assholes would remind me of the big picture. The end game. This sucks right now, I hear you, but you need this race. You almost have things paid off, and Johnny owes a little more on the garage. Tomorrow’s race is the opportunity to walk away with large rubber bands and thick pockets.” He looks around the suite casually, making sure no one is close to approaching us.

“You’re almost done. Then you can walk away. Quit if you want. Go legit if you want. Do not forget why you’re doing this.”

I turn my head, my eyes flashing. If he was anyone else but my longtime friend, I’d have buried him by now. “I will never forget. They are all that matter.”

Luca scoffs, but there's a hint of a smile on his mouth too. “How is our favorite firecracker?”

“Call her that again, I dare you.” I practically growl at him, and he pretends to hold his hands up in surrender.

“I yield. I yield. Jesus, Braysen said you were surly as ever when he saw you guys in person. I didn’t think you’d still be a caveman over her.”

“She’s my life, Luca. I may be doing this for Sam and for Dylan but the thought of not being home with them or never being with them is enough to take me to my knees. I hate that I lied to her.” My head falls forward, my chin to my chest, and I take a deep breath.

Luca exhales and claps my shoulder. “Technically, you didn’t lie. You are in Vegas and you are visiting me.”

His words are true, but in my heart, it feels like a lie. Then again, I’m hiding even more things that Sam doesn’t know about yet. My hand slides into my pocket and I pull out my phone, opening the app that's going to show me my world. Sam and Dylan fill the black screen instantly. Dylan is shoving her puff snacks in her mouth and pointing excitedly at the TV. Judging by the braids that Sam is putting in her hair, I’d guess that my little Pretty Girl is watching Frozen tonight. She looks back at her mom all smiles and chatter while Sam just watches her as if she’s the little miracle she is. God, I miss them. I want more than anything to be there, right next to Sam on the couch, hearing Dylan’s excitement over her favorite parts. I want to carry her to bed and tuck her in with her favorite blanket. I want to help Sam clean up the living room and then spend all night with her hot pussy wrapped around my cock while I put her to bed. Despite my urge to be there instead of here, I can reluctantly admit that Luca is right. I owe Johnny just a little more to help put Dad’s shop in the clear. After this it will be completely paid off. I have another year left that is owed on Sam’s tuition, not to mention her continued rent, if she doesn’t agree to move in with me when I bring it up once I’m back. Then there’s also the three-carat emerald cut diamond that I’ve been eyeing up, that looks like it was made to be on my Pretty Girl’s finger.

“How’s the show tonight?” Luca grins, his perceptive gaze going from my phone to my face.

“Looks like another princess movie night.” I shrug, closing out of the app and tucking my phone back in my pocket.

Luca hums under his breath and rubs his chin with his hand. “She reached out to me.”

“I hope you weren’t a dick to her. I told her she should call you after everything I heard. Her reasoning was shit and I’m still trying to wrap my head around her idea that she didn’t want me to be alone.” Just remembering the words I heard months ago has me boring holes through the glass in front of me.

“Chill, Kane.” Luca grunts. “I was happy to hear from her finally and I told her as much. It was a bad decision she made, but it shows me how much she loved you.”

“By breaking up with me.” My brow rises.

“No, jackass. She thought she was trapping you and she wanted you to be able to still have a future, knowing she was changing hers. Too bad for her she didn’t realize the lengths you would go to in order to take care of her. She didn’t want us to have to take sides. I told her there wouldn’t have been any choice. She is one hundred times better to look at than you. Easy decision.”

I crack a smile at that and he claps me on the back. “Come on. The faster we get this over with, the faster we can get back to my apartment and you can fall asleep watching your creepy surveillance video.”