Page 71 of Derivation

“It’s simple: I have reasons. One, you’re my roommate now. I don’t want to date a roommate. Too many complications. Two, you’re working at the company on this massive project with me. I don’t want to screw that up. Three, we’re friends, and I’d like to keep you as a friend. Four, and probably the biggest reason of them all, you like Sarai.”

“What? I don–”

“You can stop trying to deny it. It’s obvious. I think you liked her about a decade ago, too.”

“Oh, God. It’s that obvious? Does she know?”

“No, she’s Sarai.”

“What does that mean?”

“That she’s generally oblivious to women liking her. It takes her time to figure it out, or the woman says something to her directly.”

“Well, that makes me feel a little better, at least. I thought about asking her out, but you just listed two reasons why you didn’t ask me, and those reasons apply to her and me, too.”

“I won’t say anything to her if you’re worried about that.”

“Does Enya know? Or Violet?”

“I have no idea. It’s possible, but they wouldn’t say anything, either.”

“I did like her back then.” She smiled at the memories. “That whole weekend, I wished things were different. I had a plan for my gap year, and Sarai was returning to the US soon. She was also older and seemed to think I was too young for her.”

“She did, yeah, but it wasn’t about the age, really. It was just the different times in your life. You weren’t even in college yet, and she was finishing up and about to start work.”

“Did she say that to you?”

“She mentioned that when you wanted to come back to Amsterdam. I think we all assumed you had a crush on her, and that was why. She said, ‘Even if that were true,’ and then what I just said.”

“Did she say that she had a crush on me, too?”

“Oh, no. I am not doing that.” Arlowe leaned back in her chair. “I was honestly only half paying attention to things back then because of Eline and me, but even if I remembered word for word, I wouldn’t tell you. I’m a vault for you, but I’m a vault for all my friends, which means I’ll never tell anyone their dirty secrets.”

“So, Sarai has dirty secrets?”

“If you find out, it won’t be from me.”

“Well, now, I’m really curious.”

“You could just ask her, you know? Maybe she’ll tell you on your first date.”

“I can’t ask her out,” she argued.

“Why not?”

“I told you.” Gabi looked up at the open door leading to the kitchen just in case Sarai was nearby. “The same reasons you didn’t ask me.”

“Well, I also don’t know that I want a relationship, but I know that Sarai does.”

“We live and work together now.”

“Look, it’s up to you, but if you asked her out and she said no, it would be awkward for a while, yeah, but then, you’d work past it, and at least it would be out there. If you don’t, you’re going to be sitting here, looking up at the kitchen because you’re afraid she’s going to be there.”

“You caught that, huh?”

“Yes. You were, yet again, very obvious. I mean, what are you going to do? Just not tell her? Not see if she’s into it? Keep pining away? Not date anyone else?”

“Is Sarai thinking about dating someone?” Gabi asked.