Page 73 of I’d Be Honored

A powerful shiver ran through Maddie’s entire body at the request. She returned to her earlier position, knees on either side of Hayley’s head, her center hovering just above Hayley’s mouth. But this time, Maddie lowered herself down until she felt the flick of Hayley’s tongue.

Something profound shifted between them that night, and Maddie knew there would be no coming back from it. She wanted this feeling, this fierce, undeniable connection with Hayley, to stretch on forever. She wanted to be completely absorbed into Hayley’s world, to become the person she trusted most, the one she chose every single day.

NINETEEN

HAYLEY FELT THE HOURS PASSING BY faster with each day as the wedding and Maddie’s departure drew closer. Two days had passed since Maddie surprised her after work in that goddamn lingerie—since Hayley had given up everything she’d ever known. She had never surrendered so much of herself to anyone before. She’d never even wanted to. But that night, everything had suddenly changed, and she let herself fall straight into the heat coursing through her body. The memory of it clung to her skin, warm yet unsettling, making the days ahead feel even harder to face.

She sat at her desk at the office in a daze, daydreaming about what they’d shared. Maddie had accomplished something no other woman ever had before, and Hayley had welcomed it. She pictured Maddie’s face as she’d tied Hayley to the bedposts.

Fuck, that was hot.

Hayley’s body trembled now as she relived the moment for the hundredth time. She squeezed her legs together, crossing them tightly.

Focus, Maddox, she scolded herself.

The wedding was only three weeks away now. Hayley knew she should be thrilled. Gemma was finally marrying the love of her life, and all the marital hoopla would soon be over. Instead, anxiety coiled tight inside her. Time was quickly running out before Maddie boarded a plane and was on her way back to her life in LA.

Hayley stared at her computer screen, blank and unblinking, as she tried to figure out how to get her life back under control.

Sarah bounced into her office, holding a box of cupcakes in one hand and a bundle of balloons in the other. “Happy birthday, boss!” her assistant cheered.

Hayley groaned. She looked at her watch, then sighed when she realized that Gemma would be at her place in under an hour.

“Thanks, Sarah,” she offered quickly, and grabbed a cupcake as she rushed out the door.

——

By the time Hayley made it back to her apartment, Gemma was already waiting for her inside.

“I can’t believe we’ve celebrated thirteen birthdays together.” Gemma sat cross-legged on Hayley’s bed, sorting through the pile of clothes beside her. “Thirty-two years old. Damn,” she teased.

“Don’t remind me.” Hayley huffed with a laugh. Gemma was only eight months younger than her, but she never missed a chance to point out who was the “older” one.

“I know what you need.” Gemma grinned, hopping off the mattress and disappearing into the kitchen.

A minute later, she returned triumphantly, holding a shooter in each hand. They’d collected dozens during their years at UPenn, but only these two had made the move with Hayley from their college apartment to New York.

“For old time’s sake,” Gemma prompted and raised her tequila shot, her glass etched with the phrase, “I get us into trouble...”

Hayley lifted her own matching glass in response, which read, “I get us out of trouble.”

“To you,” Gemma toasted. “May the next year be full of new memories, adventures, and love.” She winked as they both tossed back their shots of Casamigos Reposado—a far cry from the Smirnoff Vanilla they used to pregame with in college.

Gemma’s face scrunched as the liquor slid warmly down her throat. “Speaking of love…”

Hayley had been waiting for Gemma to bring up Maddie, and to her surprise, it had taken a whole—she checked the time on her phone—twenty-one minutes.

“Everything’s great,” Hayley rushed dismissively, but her voice cracked slightly at the end.

“Hayley.” Gemma’s face was no longer playful. She leveled a stare at Hayley, her brows and mouth both drawn into tight lines.

Hayley’s stomach twisted. She’d spent weeks pretending she didn’t know what was happening inside her, but the truth now pulsed beneath her skin. She had feelings for Maddie. Real ones. Terrifying ones. And in three short weeks, Maddie would be back in California, leaving Hayley behind with a heart that might not be able to survive the loss.

The idea of a genuine relationship had always scared her, at least after losing her mom so abruptly. But Maddie… Maddie had slipped past every single defense she’d thrown at her. Hayley hadn’t noticed the moment it happened, only the aftermath, when she realized that Maddie already held her hostage.

If she let herself fall any deeper, if she allowed herself to envision a future with this woman, only to watch as Maddie left the East Coast behind for good, sadness wouldn’t even begin to cover it. She’d be gutted. Hollow. Unrecognizable.

“Hayley,” Gemma urged, grabbing her wrist. “What’s wrong?”