Page 33 of Instigator

He sends me a call request, and I answer it before it can finish the first ring.

“Hey, you.”

Although I try to keep my tone steady, I wonder if he can hear how breathless I am. How eager I am to hear from him, and how fucking pissed I am in equal measure.

“Hey.” His voice is quiet. Subdued. None of his usual grumpy vitality.

“Are you done avoiding me?”

He better have a damn good reason for bailing.

“I wasn’t avoiding you,” he says.

I scoff. “You were.”

Silence stretches between us, weighted with expectation. He owes me an answer. I deserve an answer.

“Okay, yes, I was.” His heavy exhale makes my heart stutter.

“Why?”

He doesn’t pretend to misunderstand my question. Why didn’t he show up? Why didn’t he have the courtesy to tell me he wouldn’t be there? I had to push him to even answer me.

“I just… I couldn’t.”

“You’re the one who suggested we meet up.”

I may have said it in passing, but he is the one who named the time and place. He wanted this, at least at one point.

“I know. I’m sorry.” He sounds defeated.

White-hot rage burns through me. I was looking forward to finally meeting him. Yes, I was nervous as fuck, but I pushed through. I was there. And he didn’t even bother to tell me he wouldn’t be there until an hour after we were supposed to meet.

“I just want to know why.” My voice breaks. Tears spring to my eyes, and I wipe them away. I don’t want to cry over this. Over him. I refuse to cry over a waste of my time.

My stomach twists. Wish isn’t a waste of time. He hurt me. There’s a difference.

“I don’t have a good answer for you.”

“That’s not good enough, Wish.”

I hear him gulp over the line.

“Did you go to the pub? Did you see me and decide you weren’t interested?”

“No. Not at all,” he hurries to say.

“Then why?”

“I wanted to go. I wanted to be there.”

“But you didn’t want to be there enough to go.”

“It was a lot of pressure. I’m not…” He pauses, searching for the words. “What if you saw me and decided you want nothing to do with me? I don’t think I’d be able to stand losing you. I like our friendship.”

“And you thought if you saw me in person, that would ruin it?”

He chuckles, the sound bitter. “Or if you saw me and decided never to speak to me again.”