Page 36 of Home for the Holidays

Sometimes I think it’s a little weird that MacGregor brings Hailey along to events where he would otherwise need a date. He doesn’t date at all.

But when I think about them losing their parents young and how he basically raised her, plus her medical fragility, it makes sense that he wants to keep her close. They’re best friends, peas in a pod.

It’s still weird that she’s here as his date, though.

The steakhouse’s back room is decked out in Christmas decor. Easton gives me an up-nod as I enter the room, and to my surprise, Melanie greets Rachel with a warm hug. I hadn’t realized they’d gotten so close after the game the other night.

I feel like a million bucks with her on my arm tonight. She’s the most gorgeous woman in the room.

We stop at the bar for a drink—she opts for water, so I do, too—and make a lap of the room. Almost all of the guys have brought a date. A few of the young rookies, like Henry and Jenkins, have wide-eyed expressions like they can’t believe they’re here.

The team throws these big parties all the time. There’s the start of season banquet, the Halloween party, the Thanksgiving family feast, the holiday party… there will be a New Year’s Eve bash, too, plus a big party before the All Star break.

It’s a lot.

Rachel keeps to my side, letting me hold her hand or put my hand on the small of her back as we mingle and chat. She brightens when we reach Larsson and Vanessa, a genuine smile on her face.

He’s my roommate on the road, my buddy and my teammate, but we don’t hang out much outside of work. I have a feeling that’s about to change. I want to make her feel like she’s part of my life because if I have my way, she will be.

“What are you doing this weekend?” Van asks. “There’s a craft fair in Marblehead I was thinking of checking out.

Rachel hums. “I’m heading to New Hampshire for the weekend.”

My eyebrows go up. “You are?” I thought we decided she would stay here.

She shrugs. “I have two weeks off of work, but I don’t really want to stay the whole time. About seventy-two hours in my hometown is all I can handle.”

“I thought your mom was coming down.” I shove my hand into my pocket to hide the tremor. Why am I shaking?

“Just for a bit.” Rachel lifts her shoulder easily. “I need to get back to looking for an apartment.”

My jaw clenches as I try not to grit my teeth. “You’re staying with me.”

“Yeah, for now,” she says with a laugh. “I can’t stay there forever.”

“Why not?” Holy fuck, I sound like a petulant child, whining about getting his favorite toy yanked away.

Rachel’s eyes dart to Sven and Vanessa. “Maybe we shouldn’t talk about this here.”

I clear my throat. “Excuse us.”

Grabbing her hand, I pull her into an alcove. Hidden by the shadows, I feel comfortable enough to bare my soul.

“I told you I want you to stay with me,” I tell her.

“And I said I would,” Rachel says. She sets her jaw. “What’s going on with you?”

“I want you. I want us. I thought I was clear about that.”

“And I thought I was clear that I’m not ready for that.” Her lip trembles. “Look, I like you. I do.”

“But…” My stomach falls.

“But I just got out of a serious, long-term relationship where he treated me like shit for most of that time,” Rachel says. “I’m not in a headspace where I can dive into something new. I don’t want you to be a rebound.”

“You can use me as a rebound. That’s fine. I don’t care,” I lie.

She shakes her head, cupping my face. “I care. I can’t do that to you.”