Page 26 of Walk the Line

“Well, this is the one so it might be longer. We haven’t even caught up on your new university yet.”

“There’s nothing to say.” I respond. “It’s an educational institution.”

“Is it at least going better than the last one?”

“Yes.”

“Well, I won’t praise you just yet. Term time has only just started so it’s not a good enough time to judge. If you can make it until Christmas without getting expelled then you’ve beaten your record.

I don’t care to say anything but, “Okay.”

“Have you taken up any new activities?”

“I told you I was still going to do Hockey.”

“And I told you that was ridiculous.”

“That’s literally what my Scholarship is for.”

“This is why we can’t connect. Because you always think you know better than my advice.”

I live in a world where self awareness is lacking amongst so many people.

I’m sure my inability to take her advice is we’ve never been able to correct, even when I was a child.

“It’s not advice if you’re telling me what to do.”

“You’re a child who has shown you have no skills of reasoning at all. Of course I will tell you what to do.”

“I’m continuing Hockey.”

I know what I’m up against here, what the consequences could be if I don’t fall in line. But I’ve already started at this new university she decided on for me, I’m living in the house she chose for me. If I decide to fall out of line with this one thing, it won’t be enough for her to ruin her personal image.

It’s what she cares about more than anything, and me playing Hockey is not a threat to that.

There’s a pause before she expectantly says, “Fine. But you better make sure you win the League.”

I don’t say anything.

“Okay?”

“Hm,” is all I let out.

“That’s it for today,” she says, but I can feel she’s holding back on an insult or too. I wouldn’t mind, I’m past the point of being offended by her thoughts about me. “See, it wasn’t so bad, was it?”

“Hm.”

“I’ll call you in two weeks.”

“I know.”

“Bye.”

I’m glad she doesn’t wait any length of time for me to say it back, cutting off the call straight away.

I’ll take my where I can, especially because we both know I wasn’t going to say it anyway.

I turn to my front on the bed once I’m off the phone and throw my head against the pillow repeatedly.