Page 67 of How We Began

Yeah… that sort of late.

For the longest moment I stared at her, unable to think of one useful thing to say.

Late periods are a problem for grown-ups, which I’m not.

“Have you taken a test?”

She nodded her head in confirmation, the smallest of gestures, so small and unsure and fragile, it completely broke my heart.

I had no words to say, nothing of any use, so I just put my arm around her and pulled her in towards me as she started to sob hysterically. It was that hitched, snotty crying that people do when they finally let it go. Snot bubbles and everything. “I think I’m going to be late for a while, Lil.”

God. Of all the unexpected things, I wasn’t even remotely expecting that. “Mer, you’ll be okay. I promise.” I was lying, but the rule book says it’s okay to lie if the need is urgent and based on desperation.

“Don’t tell him, will you?” She wiped her nose on her sleeve.

Snotty snail trail aside, I shook my head. “Who? Ben?”

Obsessed much.

“No! Tristan.”

“Um, I think he might notice.”

“I need some time to think first.”

I paused for a moment. She was asking me to keep a pretty hefty secret from my brother, but then technically I’d only liked him for the last three months out of twenty-six years so I knew where my loyalties should lie.

“Of course I won’t tell. You’re my best friend.”

She cried even harder and I just held her tighter. Soon the practical part of my brain started to kick in.

“Surely you were using something?” I cringed at the thought of discussing my brother having sex. In fact I wanted to hurl, but I think I was pretty grown-up about it.

“We were, but that night at Christmas we were so drunk, I think we just… just… just sort of forgot. He’s going to hate me.”

She sobbed even harder, soaking down to my shoulder through my jumper.

“He’s not going to hate you. He’s going to be worried about you. You’re very young.”

Her sobs got louder.

“I love him, I just didn’t expect this.”

I rocked her a little. “I know you do, babe. Don’t worry. We’ll get this all sorted.”

That was the wrong thing to say again. She pushed against me and sat up, snot everywhere.

“I am not getting rid of it.” She glared through red-rimmed eyes.

“God, Meredith! I’d never suggest that to you—ever.”

Appeased and no longer about to rip my head off, she snuggled back down against me and I spent the next hour smoothing her hair as she lay there giving in to the odd uncontrollable sob. That was until Ben poked his head in around the door, but I shook mine at him to shoo him away.

When she was finally asleep, I eased myself away from her, all hot and sweaty from where she’d made me clammy with her tears. I covered her up with my duvet and found myself blinking with stinging eyes as I looked down at her.

I mean… What the hell?

How on earth did this happen. I mean, I know how it happens… but HOW… HOW??