Page 58 of The Other Side of Green

A hand landed on my shoulder and I whirled. “Luca, back the fuck off.”

Green eyes stared at me with deep depths. “Lyra, sweetheart, don’t do this.”

My chest heaved with ragged air ripping through me. “You don’t understand, Jack, she’s ruined everything. She always does.”

His hand, large and firm slipped down the back of my head, running through the lengths of my curls. “I know, I know, but don’t do this to Grams. You’ll regret it.”

“She’s going to throw me out. If she gets this house, she’s never going to let me stay here. She’ll make me leave the place Grams always was.”

“Shhhh, she’s not.” He pulled me in. Torn between willingness and repulsion, I allowed him to curl me into his chest. Pushing me away slightly, he smoothed a hand down my face. “No one can make you do anything, Lyra Bird. No one.”

A wistful depth shone in his eyes and for one blissful moment I forgot Mom stood there. Infinite possibilities whirled around us, teasing us with the edges of almost and maybe. Maybes that couldn’t be didn’t belong in a teak lined kitchen in New Orleans.

Maybe I loved him enough I could live with the lie forever… keep it just for me… just so he could be mine. The thought that as my brother he would be with someone else, would one day marry someone else, have children. It made me want to die. Cease to exist, poof, gone, forever.

As the thought registered on the ‘sick fuck’ scale within my brain, the kitchen door crashed open, Luca barreling in followed by Eva and Evan.

“Mom! What are you doing?” Luca tried to grab her, his gaze darting between where Jack held me cradled in a gentle grasp and to where Mom stood and watched us, eyes wild like she’d had a killer hit of her favorite poison. I wished she would, then maybe she’d die. And yeah, maybe I deserved to go to hell for even thinking it, but there it was, clear as day, thoughts that couldn’t be undone.

“Nothing. Just chatting to Little Miss Snooty Pants here.”

“Mom.” He tried to pull her back through the door. “This isn’t the time, she’s upset enough.”

Mom didn’t move. Her gaunt face stared at me. Confusion edged in lines and wrinkles.

“Jack Cross?” she asked, like she couldn’t place the boy who’d always lived next door.

Luca stared at me, his mouth open, like he was summoning the words that could shout out and stop a train smash from ripping through a station.

“Oh my god, this is classic.” Mom bent over, clutching her chest, shrill laughter blasting from her mouth and bouncing off Grams’ kitchen units. “Jack and Lyra?”

“Shh.” Jack hissed, his gaze darting to where Eva stood with her hand covering her mouth.

Mom’s peel of laughter rang louder, harsher, shriller, until my eardrums wanted to burst. “Brother and sister.”

I huffed a breath, chest caving.

Jack stared at me. Blue and Jack, one and the same. Two things I loved, for different reasons.

Time stretched.

Still.

Never ending.

No finish line stood in sight.

Just Mom’s laugh and Jack’s green stare.

Automatically, I curled a hand around his cheek. “Jack.”

“What’s she talking about?” He asked, head tilting to the side, his voice all echoes of the past. Jack Cross ceased to exist. Only Blue.

Blue and Green.

“Oh my god.” Her voice cut through the air again. The kitchen crushed smaller, the air becoming tighter, harder to grasp, the walls closing. “Your daddy liked to pay for it, didn’t you know?”

“Mom!” She couldn’t break me anymore, but she’d destroy Jack. Blue. Jack. Blue.