Page 93 of When We Are Old

“No.” Jack tugged on her arm. “We're going away with you. A family. Blended, Daddy called it, like a milkshake.”

Ronnie’s shoulders sagged and her focus trained on where I sat. Shaking her head, she turned to Ange who shrugged her shoulders.

“I’ve given you my advice,” another shrug, “It’s up to you what you do with it.

Just then Hannah came out, phone still glued to her hand. “What’s going on? Jack, Ewan? What are you doing? Those are your best pyjamas, Jack.”

She was right, they were. I loved the fact that she knew this about Jack after only a few days. My heart pulsed and expanded, making room for her to fit in, even with her moods and eye rolling.

I pushed open the car door and stretched out. “Are we going on holiday or what?”

Ronnie’s cheeks coloured. “I should have knocked and come in.”

“Aye, should have, but I understand. I know you.” And I did. I knew her with more detail and care than I had ever known anything. So I also knew I had to not mess this up. She’d run, scared by her fears at the first sign of difficulty she'd found.

Which made it my first job in life to make being with me the easiest thing she’d ever done. How I’d do that, I didn’t know.

All I did know was that there was the perfect cottage waiting for us, ready for me to make a start.

Perfect

Ronnie

“Is there any way Liam will let us stay here forever?” I curled into Matthew’s side, pushing all the best bits of me into the best bits of him.

He’d set the alarm extra early, just so he could wake me up the very best way. God, had it been the best way.

“So you’re not angry about the early morning wake up anymore?” He smiled a kiss into my hair.

“God, no.” I stretched my toes, my legs weighed heavy. I’d been undone in the very best way. Thank goodness for robust Scottish furniture making and soundproof flagstone flooring. “Having a teenager walking around is not helpful for the love life.” I chuckled and pressed a kiss against his chest. The man was a legend. My heart was pounding so damn fast I could barely hear the roll of the sea that had been our backdrop the last couple of days.

Everything about this was perfect.

Him, me. The kids, all behaving and trying hard.

In the seaside town we were a complete family, far away from our real lives.

I pushed another kiss and then another, travelling down his glorious body. And glorious it was. Heavenly. I got why now. Matthew ran like the bloody clappers. He’d been out along the stretch of shoreline for a good hour long run every day since we’d arrived, normally back and showered before I rolled out of bed.

Not today though. Today I was the exercise.

And let’s praise the lord for that.

Another kiss and I swiped my tongue along his stomach, revelling in the grooves of my favourite landscape.

“Ronnie,” he whispered, catching my hair as I moved further south. I ignored him though and carried on my journey until I nestled under the duvet between his legs. He smelled of morning sex and cotton sheets and as I skimmed my lips along his hard-on I relished in the warmth and familiarity we now had.

All of this was unlike anything I’d ever known. Beyond any dream I’d ever have dared to spin.

I tasted us together as I glided my mouth around him and hollowed my cheeks.

Together we tasted divine.

The thought lanced me out of nowhere, blindingly clear, and once it settled in my head I couldn’t shake it out.

My period.

Usually Godzilla and I were synced in some unfortunate twist of events, but hers had gone… but days later… oh God.