Page 111 of When We Are Old

“Me too.” I sighed. “But I totally get it. Let’s talk later once you’ve got the boys down.”

“How about a FaceTime date night?”

I chuckled, firing some mirth into the sound. I wanted a proper date, where I could touch him, but I guessed FaceTime would bridge the gap for another week. “Sure. I’ll speak to you later.”

We ended the call and I turned to face Ma’s laser beam stare. “What?” I asked.

“How long are you going to keep this going on for?”

“Until Hannah’s finished school.” I shrugged. The time between now and then stretched in front of me like a parched desert.

Ma shook her head, but I didn’t need a lecture. I turned to walk into the hallway just as Hannah barrelled through the front door. At least I thought it was Hannah. Mascara streaked down her red blotched face, her school shirt untucked, tie askew.

“Oh my god, what’s happened?” I grabbed her into my arms. “Has someone hurt you?” My heartbeat thudded in my ears.

“No.” She swiped at her face, palming mascara across her skin.

“What’s going on?” I tried to stop her rushing past me.

“Nothing. Just leave me.” Her sob snatched in her throat and snapped my heart clean in two.

“No way. Talk to me. I thought you and Annabelle were going to the party tonight?”

Her shoulders heaved. “No. Jackson is taking someone else.”

“Who? Annabelle?” I couldn’t keep up with this.

“No. Fran.”

“Who the hell is Fran?”

“A bitch that’s who?”

“Okay, calm down.” I put my hands on her shoulders, hoping I could soothe her a little bit. “So, he’s going out with someone else?”

“Y-e-e-es.” Another heaved sob.

“Well then he’s not worth worrying about.”

She cried harder and my heart cracked deeper and wider with every sob she made. “B-u-t I like him.”

“Oh, sweetie.” I pulled her in tight. “I know you do, but he’s not worth it if he makes you cry like this.”

“B-u-u-t Matthew and you.”

I pushed her back a little so I could meet her eye. “Don’t use us as an example.”

“Mum.” She crushed herself into my chest and I wrapped my arms around her so tight I never wanted to let her go.

“You sure you don’t want to go to the party and show him what he's missing?” Said no sane parent ever. I was pretty sure this advice wasn’t advocated in parenting books, but it seemed sound to me.

“No.” Her tears soaked through my shirt.

“What do you want to do?”

She pulled back to blink up at me. “Can we go to Matthew’s?”

“Now?”