Page 12 of Scars of Silk

She doesn’t say anything, and my words just roll around my head: memories, hopes, broken dreams.

“Have you ever wondered if you actually do love her? I mean she’s a pain in the arse. Maybe you’ve just been in love with the idea of her and you’re scared of not being able to hold onto that idea anymore because it’s tied in so close with your dad. Al wouldn’t want you to be broken-hearted over a dream he put in your head with all his stupid nonsense talk.” She pauses and takes a breath. “Dan, she’s not coming back. She loves Elijah. He’s the one who can heal her. We’ve all got to move on.”

I push myself up from the sofa, stretching and running my hands through my hair. My body has eased up a little the last couple of days. Tonight might not be a death certificate after all.

I don’t know how I feel about that.

“I’ve gotta go. I’ve got something on later.”

“Stay and have lunch. I’m by myself until I get Roger from nursery.”

“Nah.” I lean down and kiss her cheek. “I’ve only got a few hours. I’ll see you soon.” Maybe.

I walk to the shop, jangling my keys and giving it the obligatory jiggle when I try and get the brass Yale into the lock. I keep the sign closed and just sit on my dad’s chair. When Faith came back for those couple of weeks, this place had life again. It buzzed, laughter and music bouncing from the walls.

Silence stretches around me. Dust settles on every surface. I sigh and it breaks the silence.

Maybe tomorrow I won’t have to worry.

Maybe tomorrow won’t exist.

Four

Sienna

A quick glance in the mirror tells me my make-up is fine, although I know the red lipstick will cause a frown. Plucking a tissue from a mirrored box on the bathroom counter, I dab at it a little. It’s still as vibrant as red plump strawberries in the height of summer, but I dull the gloss.

Checking my clutch, I clasp it back together and then leave the restaurant’s ladies. I’d rather be anywhere but here. It’s Friday, but it’s on me. I cancelled the weekly scheduled meeting, now I’ll pay the price by wasting my Friday evening.

Dad’s already there, sipping a whisky, scowling at a piece of paper. Excellent. The mood for the evening is set.

“Dad.” I call his attention and pushing away the sheet of paper he stands, leaning in and kissing me on the cheek. Behind us a waiter hovers, ready to help me into my chair. In this restaurant they expect you to be unable to bend your knees and pull a chair in at the same time. Multi-tasking isn’t a suitable pastime for fine dining.

“Sienna.” His focus is on my lips, a frown creasing between his eyebrows.

“Apologies for Wednesday; I got caught up.”

He waves his hand and we sit, the waiter wedging the chair into the back of my legs. “It happens. You know I like our weekly catch up’s. It’s important that we know what is happening and are fully open.”

I take a deep sip of the ice water in a tall glass by my place setting. Ooh, I’m thinking not right now. He does not want to know what I did the other day and with whom. In fact, he can never know. The consequences would be too high a price to pay.

“Now, tell me.” He steeples his fingers. “How is work?”

“Dad, you hate me talking about work.” I shake my head a little. Let’s call this groundhog Wednesday, albeit on a Friday.

“I don’t hate you talking about work; I just wish you didn’t do it. There is simply no need.”

I sigh, my shoulders drooping. “And if I didn’t do it, what would we talk about? I’d be like Mum and we would sit in silence at mealtimes.”

“Don’t be rude about your mother.”

“Sorry.” I search for a waiter so I can order a glass of something. Anything. “I just worry. She doesn’t seem to have anything apart from me and you.”

“She has her charities; they keep her busy. She runs the house, and that’s no small job. It’s a big estate to manage. And I don’t want her doing anything else. She’s my wife. You know that.” His eyes flash and my stomach dips a little. I nibble my lower lip to stop from saying anything more enticing, but I can’t help myself.

“I’m sure she wakes every morning with the vitality of life.”

“Sienna! What has got into you? I assume you have been swept up with the Faircloughs new dramas. I’ve heard from Connie how disastrous things are over their side.”