Page 47 of The Game

I shook my head, and the back of my skull rubbed painfully on the hard grass. "No."

"Because of you, or because of Anthony?" I shot her a warning look when she mentioned my brother's name. "Cause the way I see it, you keep playing for him, but he gave up because he knew there was more to life."

"That's not why I won't quit."

She rolled onto her side and stared at me until I met her gaze.

"It's because I won't let that bastard beat me. Jase Willis never wanted me there, and I can't help but think the last few weeks of him being 'nice' was just another game to him." My pulse raced as I allowed the worry that had been eating me alive for the last few days to come up to the surface and I swallowed hard. I’d been played.

Her eyes didn't waver. "Will you please let me come to practice with you on Monday so I can punch the fucker in the face?"

I laughed again, and one tear squeezed itself out the corner of my eye. "I'd love you to do that, but then I would be fired for once and for all."

"Then you could go on TV and have every man in the country fall at your feet when you discuss playing with balls in that sexy Surrey accent of yours."

"No." My heart beat a little tighter in my chest. "I'm keeping my job, Bets. I'm not leaving."

Betsy peered in a little closer and watched aghast as another tear slid down my face. "Oh my god, do not cry over that arsehole. Please don't cry. He's not worth a single teardrop and he never has been."

My fingers strayed absently to the scar across my eyebrow. "I know."

But I wanted to cry until it felt like my soul was going to crumple and split in half. A half that thought Jase Willis could be anything more, and the half that knew he would be nothing other than what he was.

It was a good weekend, and when I walked into work on Monday I felt a lot lighter. My step was springier, and after a weekend with my best friend I was ready to take them all on. The Lion was on the phone as I walked into the building, but I ignored him and breezed past, telling myself that his words didn't falter when he saw me march past.

Because even if they did, I didn't give a shit.

Waller was happier, and the boys were more cohesive than they'd been the whole season. Everyone was happy, apart from the Lion who stropped about the place like he'd had his paw caught in a hunter’s trap. On Tuesday, we all watched in amazement as he exploded during a team chat and kicked over the waste bin. Waller hauled him off at that point, and we didn't see him again the rest of the day.

The following day he was calmer, but his conversations on the phone continued and he still didn't look at me. I was invisible. The ghost girl.

I wondered how his shoulder would hold up on the Friday match because we hadn't done anything on it for over a week.

I hoped it bloody well hurt like hell.

My fuse was short and snappy. And when I say snappy what I mean is that I wanted to inflict some damage on bare bones. I had the fact Sammy was going to be absent all weekend in the back of my mind. Vanessa's grandparents were picking him up from school and taking him to their house. The term was nearly over for the summer, and this was their last break before they had him for a whole week. I was hoping that he wouldn't tell them about the Lion visiting us at our house, but I'd decided not to mention it to him. Far worse than them finding out the Lion had been more involved in our lives than the papers had made out, would have been Sammy saying ‘Aunty Lyssi told me not to tell you about the man that keeps coming around’.

Gemma gave me 'that' look when I went to get changed for the game. I peeled my vest over my head before turning and asking, "What?"

"Why are you letting him treat you this way?"

I swabbed some deodorant on under my arms. "I'm not letting anyone treat me like anything."

"Rumour has it he announced that you were friends, and then two minutes later completely ignored you."

My eyes rolled heavenward. Was Waller the biggest gossip on the team? Yes, he was.

"I'm past caring." I wiggled out of my training shorts and into my uniform chinos.

"So you don't care that all the boys are going out tomorrow for his birthday?"

I gave a minuscule shake of my head. "No." I hadn't even known it was his birthday coming up, not even when we were in the short-lived friend zone.

I tried to forget all about it, but as I sat watching him bowl his way through the opposition all I could think was that I hoped the fucker sprouted new grey hairs in the morning.

Another empty Saturday awaited me and this time I knew Betsy wasn't going to magically appear. She was back on the team. Her punishment paid for her vajayjay indiscretion. I called my mum and dad in Spain and chatted with them about, well nothing, and then went for a run.

The run wasn't enough. At the end, despite the sweat and the ache in my limbs, I still felt coiled like a spring. I went straight into some yoga, working my ashtanga poses until I was near to passing out. I was in the bath, pushing my nine o’clock bedtime past a comfortable threshold when my mobile rang. I ignored it and continued soaking my screaming muscles.