Page 92 of Unexpected Prejudice

“Are you sure?”

It was sometimes easy to forget how pushy he could be. The first time I met Chief, I hated that quality of his. He was one of the volunteer counselors in Juvie. I never understood why someone would work with trash like us out of goodwill. A nice guy like him doing that job for free? Yeah. It was hard to believe at the time. The only reason I agreed to go to his group sessions was for Jessie. He liked him from the get-go. As it turned out, going to those group therapy sessions was the best thing we did. Not only did we meet Chief, but we also got to know Andrei and Diesel.

I turned my back to him and started to organize the surf boards by size and color. I preferred it when they looked in order. “Yeah, I’m sure,” I said, even though it couldn’t be further from the truth.

Two weeks had passed since that night. I naively believed I would feel better over time, but I was wrong. So foolishly wrong. The sounds of Jessie’s moans, the words he said to Jordan as he fucked him, the feeling of their weight crushing me. It was killing me from the inside out. The moment I started thinking about them, I couldn’t stop, and I was pulled into this terrible vortex of fears and insecurities.

My gut twisted with the strong urge to puke, but instead of saying anything and letting Chief notice my weakness, I shrugged the awful feeling away.

“If you say so.” He squeezed my shoulder before he stepped out of the shop. I followed him outside and watched him pull out the keys to lock up the place.

Ready to go home, Chief stopped me. “I just want to make sure you remember I’m here for you. Okay, kid? For whatever you may need.”

What was he talking about? Did he know about the threesome? Did Jessie tell him something? The thought horrified me, and I looked down at the ground as embarrassment painted my face red. Blushing was one of my weaknesses. While I could always control my expressions, I could never hold back a flush or stop my goddamn ears turning red.

“Why are you so sure something is wrong?” I bit back, well aware of the hostility in my tone. “I mean, if you want to check on someone, why not talk to Andrei or Diesel?” Trying to deflect away from me, I brought up the other guys. For the past week or so, Diesel and Andrei weren’t speaking. Not even a word.

“Levi, I didn’t mean to upset you.” He offered me a kind smile that made me regret how I snapped, but I couldn’t help it. Between feeling scared and somehow betrayed, I was angry.

I had no right to be angry at Jessie because I had agreed to the threesome in the first place, which made me even more furious. I hated myself for being mad at him for something that wasn’t his fault. I also hated myself for being unable to put this whole thing behind me. Not only did I constantly remember that night, but for some unsolved reason, Jordan continued to hang out with us.

“I’m not upset.” I looked up at our room’s window. The light was on, and music was coming from afar. Jessie was probably drawing. “I’ve just got some tests to study for.”

I gave Chief a weak smile that fooled no one before telling him good night and returning to the house.

With Andrei sleeping at Miles’s tonight and Diesel gone to only God knew where, I went to our room without stopping. As I thought, Jessie was busy drawing on his tablet, not noticing I’d entered the room. He hummed the lyrics of the song playing and had his full attention on the tablet.

People often believed that having ADHD meant you couldn’t focus at all, which was complete bullshit. Jessie’s concentration was brilliant when it came to his passions, like art.

“Hey, Kotik.”

Finally noticing me, he looked away from the screen. “Babydoll!” He jumped from the chair with a big smile plastered on his face. “I didn’t hear you come in.”

He wrapped two long arms around me and hugged me for a minute before letting go. My stomach flipped because while the familiar embrace filled me with warmth, it also reminded me how lonely and scared I was when he touched Jordan. Trying to think of anything but that awful night, I cleared my throat.

“I just came in… helped Chief in the shop. Anyway, what are you drawing?” I looked back at the table where he left his tablet.

He clapped his hands before running back to the desk and picking up the device. “You’re gonna love it,” he started saying while handing it to me. “It’s the art I’m making for that artist I like. Remember when I told you about it?”

Of course, I remembered. He’d been so hyped about the art challenge for weeks.

I took the tablet from his hands, excited to see his creation. “I thought you didn’t know what to draw.”

“Yeah, but it just struck me, and I worked on it like crazy. I think it turned out pretty good.”

His excitement became nothing but white noise as I examined the three figures drawn on the digital canvas.

Two of the three I already knew were Rybka and Yezhik, but the third character who joined the pair was all new. And despite never seeing him before, it wasn’t hard to guess who inspired the ripped, dark-skinned, light-eyed character.

If I had previously thought I could put that night behind me, now it was impossible. Not only did Jessie draw a threesome, he drew our threesome. Right there, in my hand, was the memory I was trying so desperately to forget.

“So, what do you think?”

I hate it.

“It’s not finished, but I think the pose is hot and the expressions turned out really well.”

“I hate it.”