Page 54 of Under a Dancing Star

BENEDICK:

“Suffer love,” a good epithet! I do suffer love indeed, for I love thee against my will.

– Much Ado About Nothing, Act V, Scene 2

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

“Tell me about Lili,” I demand after we have settled in next to one another on the faded green velvet seats in the train compartment. The journey is only a few hours but I am desperate to be there already.

“Lili is a force of nature,” Ben says fondly. “She’s American and she hasn’t much money, but what she has she spends on art. She has a terrific eye and her collection is beyond belief. She lives in this tumbledown house in Florence and every artist of any importance, and quite a lot of no importance at all, have stayed there at one time or another.”

“Including Filomena,” I say.

“Right,” Ben nods. “And – and my mother, and me.” He smiles at my surprise. “We lived in Lili’s house for almost two years when I was nine.”

“Your mother was an artist too?” I say.

“She wanted to be,” Ben says. “She was very young when she had me, with barely a penny to her name. She came over to Italy from England when I was still small and fell in with a group of artists in Florence who pretty much saved her life. They saved mine, too, I suppose.”

“Is that how you know Filomena?” I ask.

Ben nods. “She was a friend to Mum when she really needed one. And she taught me about art. She was the one who encouraged me, who told me I had talent. It was a wonderful time living with them. We were so happy. At least, for a while.”

“And Sir Hugh?” I ask quietly. “Is that when you met him as well?”

I’m sure I feel him tense beside me, but his voice when he speaks is neutral. “Yes. My mother modelled for him.”

I sense that’s all he will say on the subject and we sit quietly for a moment.

“So this is like going to visit family for you?” I say finally.

Ben nods again. “Lili and Gert are probably the closest thing I have to aunts.”

“Is Gert Lili’s sister?”

Ben smiles. “No, not her sister. Gert is Lili’s … lover, I suppose you would call her. But a partner, really. They’ve been together for over twenty years.”

“Oh, right,” I say, reminded again of how far away I am from my parents’ world. I find myself smiling, thinking about it.

“What?” asks Ben.

“I just can’t imagine my parents’ reaction to such a set-up,” I explain.

“But you’re not shocked?” he asks dryly. “Not that I should be surprised. It seems that shocking you is an impossibility.”

“Thank you,” I say, pleased. “And no, I’m not shocked. I’m not quite as naive as people seem to believe. I’m looking forward to meeting Lili and Gert.”

“There are plenty of people who really don’t like it. Lili and Gert move in bohemian circles where people won’t bat an eyelid, but outside of their friends it can be different…”

“Yes, I can imagine,” I say. “It must be difficult, especially with what’s going on politically. The fascists aren’t precisely welcoming of anyone they consider different. Though my uncle seems quite excited about his meeting with Mussolini,” I add dryly.

“I’ve heard him say that fascism is the future,” Ben says.

“I’m sure he believes it,” I say, “but I don’t think he understands the real cost. Look at what’s happening in Germany. Look at Ursula and Klaus. If you ask me, Mussolini is a dangerous man.”

Ben leans back in his seat. “You may be right,” he says. “You’ll meet plenty of people in the next couple of days who share that opinion.”

I glance over. “But not you?” I ask.