Page 56 of A Sky Painted Gold

“Why are you wasting yourself on Bernie when you look so lovely?” she asks, gaily, spilling some of the drink in her glass as she waves her hand at me.

I slip into the seat next to her. “I’m not wasting myself,” I say. “Bernie is a lovely dancer.”

Bernie bows. “The lady is not wrong there,” he says, gesturing for the waiter and ordering a bottle of champagne.

“And I danced with him because he’s the only man here that I know,” I can’t resist adding.

“Ouch,” Bernie exclaims, clapping a hand to his chest and swooning a little against his chair. “My poor wounded pride!”

“You know what I mean,” I snort.

But Caitlin has already moved on. “Now,” she says more loudly, turning back to the rest of the group, “what does a girl have to do to get a drink around here?”

A cheer goes up around the table. At that moment a friendly-looking man with sandy hair stops next to me and asks me to dance. I glance towards Caitlin.

“Go, go!” she exclaims. “In fact, I think I’ll join you, just as soon as I’ve had another drink.”

I sneak a look at Bernie and he nods encouragingly.

“Go on, little daisy,” he calls. “Show London what you’re made of. Enjoy yourself.”

“Yes, Lou.” Caitlin grabs my arm and looks up at me. “Dance! Enjoy yourself; that’s why we’re here, after all!”

My body hums with indecision. I look at Caitlin, who has already turned to make animated conversation with Patricia. I know that really there’s nothing more I can do. If Caitlin wants to open up to me, it will be in her own time – I can’t force her, but it’s hard to just walk away. A small, selfish voice in my head reminds me that this could be my only chance to experience dancing in a real London nightclub. What happened to grabbing everything the summer has to offer? The man by my side offers me his arm, and after another moment of hesitation I put my hand on his sleeve. I make my way over to the dance floor with my partner just as the band start playing a red-hot Charleston.

“I’m afraid I’m not the greatest dancer,” the sandy-haired man says, with a rueful grin. “I’m Joe, by the way.”

“Lou,” I say, shaking his outstretched hand. He is quite good-looking, I think, and he has a nice smile.

He isn’t kidding about the dancing, though. In the end we have a lot of fun, as I try to teach him some of the steps and correct his many, many toe-crushing mistakes.

The next song brings Caitlin screeching on to the dance floor. With her by my side I feel my euphoria grow. As Caitlin dances next to me, shouting along with the singer while the fringe on her gold dress shakes and trembles, I forget about worrying over her. In this moment she is simply a carefree, sparkling girl. Joe tries to keep up with us, as does the next man and the next after that, but no one can match our pace, no one is enjoying the music more than we are.

Finally, exhausted, we go back to our seats for a break. My brain feels slightly fuzzy around the edges, and everything has taken on the sort of soft candlelit glow that comes with an evening you know you’ll remember for the rest of your life.

When the barman delivers our drinks he also brings a silver platter of cold roast beef sandwiches. I reach for one, taking a big hungry bite.

“How did he know to bring these?” I ask, my mouth full. “I’m starving.”

Caitlin bursts out laughing. “It’s so they can serve the drinks,” she explains in a very patient voice. “The law is that they can serve alcohol until twelve-thirty, but only if they are selling food too.” She shrugs. “They usually just get left.”

I stop eating, feeling my face fall. “Oh.” I swallow. “So I shouldn’t be eating them?”

“Of course you should if you’re hungry,” she says. “In fact, I’ll join you.” And we sit, companionably chewing on our sandwiches. “You know,” she says, “these aren’t actually too bad. Who’d have thought you could actually eat the food. You see?” She wags her finger at me. “I learn something new from you every day.”

“Like you should eat the sandwiches that you’re paying for?” I ask.

Caitlin slips her arm around my shoulder and pulls me towards her, the top of her head resting against mine. “You’re my best friend, you know,” she says. “You’re the best one. Better than all these lot.” She gestures around the room at the animated crowd, her movements just a little unsteady.

“I’ve never had a best friend before,” I say. “Apart from Alice, I mean.” The thought that Caitlin Cardew would call me her best friend is dazzling. I wonder what that means to her; I wonder if things will still be the same between us after the summer is over. And I wonder why, if she really means it, she won’t trust me with whatever weight she is carrying.

Caitlin pouts. “I still haven’t met this Alice. I want to meet her!”

“You can’t meet Alice,” I reply quickly.

“Why not?” Caitlin demands.

I don’t know the answer to that. Or maybe I do, but I don’t want to say it. “Because you’ll like her better than me,” I say finally, and I am more than half serious. I pick up another sandwich.