Page 51 of The Little Porto Book Club

Time to shake off the cobwebs and get outside. I’m late for my daily walk and there’s a chance I’ll miss seeing my trio of Porto mysteries by changing my schedule. They seem so tame now in comparison to this madcap adventure we’re on. I really do need to meet up with Tiago too, because he reports that his mother is on the hunt for mine. Thankfully she can’t get mother’s phone number from my cousin Catarina, because Cat’s meathead husband apparently didn’t spring for the Wi-Fi package for both of them on their cruise, because he clearly needs all the data for his TikTok dances.

Tiago and I need to figure out how to extricate ourselves from the fake dating dilemma we’ve got ourselves embroiled in.

At this point I’m not ruling out faking my own death either. Cross that bridge when I come to it and all.

A text pings: Darling, it’s Zeliá. I got your number from Tiago’s phone. When he was asleep, haha! The boy is so secretive when it comes to you! He says you value your privacy, but we’re family now – what privacy! Listen, I need your mother’s number. No reason, just to say hello. Invite her to lunch. Speaking of, when are you coming back to visit? My sisters want to meet you. Kisses.

How to handle this?

Greetings, Zeliá. My mother is currently in witness protection and—

No, that will only heighten her interest.

My mother is committing to a digital detox—

No, that’s just asking for a visit from Zeliá which means the entire extended family too.

Ah! Viviane is busy with a copyedit and will get back to you in the fullness of time.

‘Where are you off to, querida?’ Mum pops her head around my bedroom door as I’m reading the text. I startle at the sight of her, and fumble with my phone, only about eleventy-seven times before I finally catch it. The intensity of my new life is … well, intense.

I do my upmost to compose myself. ‘I’m off for my daily walk, as you well know.’ Nice try, Mother.

‘And you’re wearing perfume for that?’

‘I’m wearing it for my own personal olfactory satisfaction, if that’s what you mean.’ She’s cottoned on to me! How does she do it? I don’t have plans to meet Tiago but I’m considering calling him to see if he has any ideas on how to get us out of this new jam. My strict scheduling has crumbled because how can anyone plan when there’s twists and turns such as this?

‘You never wear perfume on your daily walks.’

I scoff. ‘And how do you know that?’

‘Lemon and cedarwood, it hangs in the air when you use it.’

Nothing gets past her. ‘Goodbye.’

‘Wait.’

I make a show of grumbling like a belligerent teenager and hope I’m not overdoing it. ‘What now?’

Her eyes narrow as she leans on the door jamb. ‘Why are you taking a book with you? A book you finished reading last night?’

Maybe Mum should be the detective! ‘How do you know I finished it last night?’ It’s Dissolution, the book Thomas recommended. I thought Tiago might like to borrow it after he finishes The Quill Chronicles.

‘Your review on Goodreads. Five stars, high praise indeed.’

‘Oh, this book?’ My mind blanks. It absolutely lets me down at the most crucial juncture. ‘Fine, you busybody. I might lend this to a book club friend. Must you interrogate me in such a way?’

‘Ah!’ She laughs. ‘Now the red lipstick makes sense.’

I forgot about the lipstick. ‘I wear red lipstick when I need a confidence boost, nothing more.’

‘Will you invite Tiago here soon? I’d like to meet him. His family? Have you met his mother yet?’

‘Nice try, you dastardly woman.’ I’m not admitting a thing. Not a chance. She’ll likely follow me and drag Tiago back by the ear so she can interrogate him.

‘OK, OK. I’d like to meet him though and you’ve banned me from book club.’ She plays the sulky victim well but it’s all a farce. Just like Zeliá with her strings-attached chocolate bonbons. Always plotting, these women, always wanting a man to put a ring on it, and for me to say yes to the dress. Hideous.

I survey my mother who studies me closely in return. ‘Have you been day drinking with Aunt Lara again?’