Page 69 of The Edge of Always

Earl turned round and smiled and Luna thought that it was so so good to be back.

‘Isn’t it a bit jolly for a graveyard?’ Mae asked. The headstones and statues were all painted bright colours – shades of purple, reds and pinks.

‘How Victorian, Mae,’ but Earl was smiling. ‘Death can be colourful, I believe.’

‘Well, let’s hope none of us test that theory too soon. This summer better be a good one because we’ve had a year. Haven’t we, Luna?’

‘It hasn’t been that bad,’ Luna answered diplomatically, when really, Mum and Dad had been arguing more than ever. From their vantage point, eavesdropping at the top of the stairs, Luna and Mae had heard the word divorce.

‘I wish they’d just get on with it,’ Mae had said. But Luna found the thought of such a big change unsettling. They hadn’t heard their parents speak of it since. So Luna tried to put it out of her mind.

‘Well, you’re here now.’ Earl was wiping his hands on a dirty tea towel. ‘Are you coming to The Edge? I took some brownies out of the oven this morning.’ Luna would never be small while Earl was around.

‘I thought you’d never ask, Earl. Lead the way,’ Mae told him, linking arms and then launching into a blow-by-blow account of her year without coming up for breath. ‘Ups and downs mostly. You know how it is.’ she said. ‘Tried to pierce my belly button, but it got infected, and I nearly died, but I did manage a soufflé that didn’t drop, so I’d say it’s a win overall.’

Emmett and Luna brought up the rear. It might have been wishful thinking but Luna was sure that he was walking closer than he normally would.

‘Hey, the carnival is in town, do you want to go tomorrow?’ Emmett asked, oblivious to what Luna was feeling about his proximity. It was to be expected, since Luna hadn’t exactly been honest about her feelings.

‘Absolutely. Sounds fun.’ They were almost at The Edge now, the concentration camp sign greeting them hello.

Emmett paused, right below the sign. ‘Best summer ever?’ he asked, holding up his little finger.

‘Best summer ever.’

They didn’t go to the carnival once – they went every day for a week. by the final night, Luna had eaten so much candyfloss, she was at risk of turning into a ball of the pink and blue sticky stuff.

‘I feel sick,’ Mae slurred. Her pupils were big. Part sugar, part the fact that she’d been drinking blue WKD vodka. They were on the worst possible ride for someone to announce imminent sickness. A sort of deadly circle thing called the Wheel of Doom, which spun around so fast and tipped upside down. They weren’t even strapped in; that’s how fast it went. The neon lights of the carnival were a blur, and Umbrella by Rihanna was blasting out, pulsing inside Luna’s skull.

‘Hold it in,’ Luna told her, her own stomach mounting quite the protest. Physics might not have been Luna’s forte exactly, but she guessed that puke and the gravitational pull of the Wheel of Doom would be traumatising for all involved.

Mae turned her head to the other side and said the same thing to Emmett, where he was plastered into his little booth. As they spun Luna was sure she was being taunted. Tested somehow. Emmett’s was the only face she could see.

Luna wasn’t sure if it was part of the testing, or if she was quite unwell herself, but Emmett was in slow motion, saying ‘no’ to Mae over and over. Luna had eaten quite a lot of sugar and drunk some WKD too. It just tasted so much like a fun drink, it made her forget it was bad for her. It also made her forget about the fact that Emmett hadn’t said anything about last summer, on the beach. He hadn’t picked up the conversation where they’d left off. If anything, he was being extra friendly. Just very, very friendly.

So Luna was using blue WKD and sugar to dull her anguish at the fact. Mae had declared that Luna would make an excellent juvenile delinquent with an alcohol dependency.

Finally, the ride stopped and they stumbled off it. Emmett rubbed Mae’s back while she puked in the grass.

Zadie, who didn’t appear to be affected by anything, even blue WKD and a mountain of candyfloss, just stood to the side, smirking at her.

‘You all right, Mae?’ she asked. Mae gave her the thumbs up mid-puke. ‘Just training my liver.’ This made Zadie smile. Luna was pretty sure that out of all of them, Mae was the only person Zadie could half tolerate.

‘Carousel?’ Emmett asked, still rubbing Mae’s back.

‘Definitely,’ Luna answered even though her denim skirt was too short to elegantly get a leg over a plastic horse.

‘I’m out.’ Mae was finally upright again, though a worrying amount of bright blue sick had just poured out of her.

‘Come on, Mae, I’ll get you some water,’ Zadie said. She looked at Luna. ‘I’ll text if she gets worse.’

Ahmed was off at some family wedding so it was just Luna and Emmett now. He smiled what Luna privately thought of as his friendly smile, small and unanimated. She hated his friendship smile.

‘Ready?’

They started to walk towards the carousel, passing the fun mirrors on their way. Luna caught sight of her distorted body, the mascara that had been dragged to the side of her eyes by the force of the spin on the Wheel of Doom, and the fact that her lips were stained blue from candyfloss. The muscles in her shoulders were pulled out of proportion, more enormous than ever.

Usually, she’d be so embarrassed to look like this in front of Emmett. She was the exact opposite of everything that The Beauty Bible encouraged her to be. She wasn’t poised, or refined, she was a literal mess.