Page 54 of The Best Ex of My Life

‘Perfect. I’ll leave you both to it,’ she says, giving me a wink before she shuts the door.

‘What’s at four?’

‘My mentoring meeting.’

‘That’s great, El.’

‘Yeah, it is. I didn’t know Pam all that well before getting the promotion, but I have to admit I’m kind of falling in love with her.’

I baulk at the phrase and push past it by shoving a full falafel in my mouth. I motion for him to go on.

‘She has this no-nonsense approach to work. The first session we had, she asked me to tell her what I was finding hard, and when I’d finally finished, she agreed with the whole lot, told me the job was basically a shit show, but she’d learned how to make it manageable over the years and would help me do the same. I’d say our meetings are eighty per cent slagging off the job, ten per cent her telling me what she’d do if she were the head and ten per cent her giving me tips on how I can manage my time better, but it helps.’

‘Good,’ I say once I’ve swallowed the food in my mouth. ‘I can tell it’s helping.’

It’s been nearly three weeks since Elliot agreed to ask for help, and he’s doing so much better. He’s looking so much better, too. A healthy pallor has returned to his skin, and he’s started looking his age again. I’d like to think my lunches are helping too, as they’re certainly helping me. In a bid to get him back on track, I’ve cast aside my usual daily selection of chips or a jacket potato from the canteen and taken up creating salads for us both with as many superfoods as I can get in. I’ve never felt so energised by the end of the day.

Turns out my plan of avoiding Elliot to get over him was completely wrong. Spending time with Elliot has been the best thing I could have done to get back to being friends. It’s not always been easy, but as long as I remind myself several times daily that Elliot is my best friend’s boyfriend and my work best friend, nothing more, I’m able to keep my focus on our friendship. Every lunch we spend together, every text conversation where we check in with each other, every shared joke puts another tick in the friendship column. The more time we spend together, the more I’m reminded how good we are as friends. As long as I keep reminding myself of that, I’m hopeful that everything else I’ve felt for Elliot will fade away. I hadn’t worked out how much I missed him until we came back together again. Now my days are more fun, easier, and I know he feels the same.

Seeing him doing so much better has also helped me move my focus back to Teddy, who isn’t doing as well. It’s become clear through her tearful calls with Karina and I that she’s struggling massively at work but that quitting isn’t on the cards. Thanks to her overbearing family and overly successful older brothers, she wholeheartedly believes that quitting isn’t an option, despite it being glaringly obvious it’s the first step she needs to take to help her start finding her way back to herself.

‘So are you looking forward to this weekend?’ Elliot asks.

Despite my worry over Teddy, my face can’t help but split into a smile.

‘Er, yeah. I take it Teddy’s told you?’

‘About you lot going snooping around some poor unsuspecting influencer’s house? She might have mentioned it.’

‘Ellory Mackenzie isn’t just any influencer, thank you. Her house and her cleaning routines are awe-inspiring. Have you seen her laundry room? I’m getting giddy just thinking about it.’

‘No. Must have missed that.’ He gives me that amused smile of his that always feels like it’s reserved just for me.

Given she’s no intention of quitting, one amazing thing Teddy’s done this week is reach out to Ellory over Instagram to offer her services when Ellory posted about there being a change on the horizon and Teddy correctly worked out it could involve a house move. The two of them connected immediately over the number of places they both go to and post perfectly arty pictures of, and Teddy has managed to land the listing for Ellory Mackenzie’s beautiful maisonette in Chorlton, by far the biggest, most expensive property Ed’s estate agency has ever had on its books. She’s so proud of herself, and so am I. I just hope seeing she can do this will lead to her seeing how much she is capable of and how little she needs a dick like Ed looming over her, dictating how she use her talents and, more frequently, when she has to put her talents away to be a dogsbody so he doesn’t have to do any real work.

Teddy expects Ellory’s house will sell in days, but before that happens, she’s given in to Karina and I badgering her and agreed to let us have a sneak peek tomorrow morning before her actual viewings begin.

‘I can’t wait. We have to be there at half seven, and that’s the earliest I’ve been up on a Saturday morning for years, but it will be so worth it just to see if she really does have her whole house as perfect as she makes out or if there are a series of messy rooms that she shoves all her crap in. Ooh, and get this – in all of the hundreds of videos she’s done, she’s never once posted from her bathroom. If you have a nice bathroom, you want people to know about it, right? I’m desperate to know what’s going on there.’

‘Sounds—’ he makes a show of trying to reach for the perfect word. ‘Riveting. Should I prepare myself for Monday’s lunchtime being you telling me all about it?’

‘In great detail,’ I assure him. He lets his head fall onto his desk in fake despair and he groans.

Karina picks me up at quarter past seven, and as soon as I open the door to her car, I burst out laughing. ‘What the hell have you come as?’

She looks down at her tailored black trouser suit and black stilettos. ‘What? It’s Ellory Mackenzie’s house. I wanted to look the part.’

‘The part of what?’ I ask as I get into the passenger seat and put the seatbelt on over my crumpled hoodie and ancient leggings. ‘You do know she’s not going to be there? And even if she was, what exactly are you trying to get across by arriving at her house dressed as the head of a gangster family?’

‘I know she’s not going to be there, but some of us thought it would be nice to show some respect by making the effort, and some of us didn’t think turning up in scruffs to view a three-million-pound house was quite setting the right tone.’

‘Hey, these aren’t my scruffs. This is my well cultivated look for maximum snooping in the little time Teddy will give us.’

‘Well, whatever it is, it’s a good job it’s only Teddy and me to see it,’ she says, putting a consolatory hand on my knee before setting off.

It turns out Karina’s wardrobe choice is our saving grace as just as I drop the polished brass knocker on Ellory’s front door to announce our arrival, mine and Karina’s phones beep at the same time with a message from Teddy.

TEDDY: FUCKING BASTARD! Ed has taken Ellory’s house from me. He’s already at the house to do the viewings I set up. DO NOT GO ROUND!