Page 18 of Guardian of Exile

“Do you really require that thing to tell you where to go?” Evra asked. “The building is right there.” She pointed. “It is quite distinctive and should be simple to navigate to.”

“I like to be prepared. Besides, this tells me the travel distance and the estimated time to walk there.” A little over half a mile, and twelve minutes on foot.

“What do you need that for? It will take the time and distance it takes to get there, no matter what your device says.”

Nyx clicked the screen off and shoved the phone into her pocket. “Fine, you’re right.” She held her arm out in invitation. “Lead on.”

Evra started walking, her brow furrowing. “Why are you angry? I am merely relaying the facts of the situation.”

Nyx blew out a breath. “I don’t know.” Evra wasn’t trying to be a smartass. She was just Evra being Evra. Serious and literal to a fault.

They walked a block in silence before Evra said, “Understand that I am not trying to push you in any direction.”

“Uh-huh,” Nyx said skeptically, as that sounded precisely like the sort of thing one said before trying to push someone else in a specific direction.

“And I am not trying to tell you what you need.”

“Uh-huh.”

“But have you considered that you may need to—what is that phrase Morgen taught me—blow off steam?”

“I blow off steam all the time.”

“Riding Temerex at breakneck speed through rugged terrain does not count as blowing off steam.”

“Agree to disagree.” The unicorn-dragon was fearless, and nothing got the heart racing like staying on the back of a twelve-hundred pound animal that loved jumping six-foot-wide ditches, only to land in a shallow pool of water on the other side and take back off at a dead gallop to dodge in and out of trees in a forest that had no cleared path.

“You need a human outlet. You aren’t sparring⁠—”

“I spar all the time,” Nyx interrupted.

“—with any conviction,” Evra finished. “You are executing rote moves like you are a novice who only just memorized them.”

Nyx didn’t say anything, because that was true. Because the alternative was letting everything she felt inside out in one of those fights, and she didn’t want to hurt Morgen or Evra. She didn’t spar with Kaden at all, because she wasn’t afraid of hurting him. Because she knew all the brakes would come off, and she was afraid of where she might end up if they did. It wasn’t something she liked to think about.

“And you are not socializing.”

“That’s not true.”

“You have arranged play dates between Tobi and your sister. That is facilitating the socialization of children. It is not socializing yourself.”

They stopped at a crosswalk, Nyx wishing it would turn to walk so they could arrive at the restaurant where this conversation would hopefully end.

“You used to go into Earth Between all the time. Since you returned, you have only gone to the Warlock’s for Tobi. Why?”

Because I only half fit in there to begin with, and only that half because everyone loved Seth and he was mine? Because every time I’m there, I’m reminded of what we almost had? Aloud, she said, “I just haven’t felt like going out.”

The light changed and they crossed the street. They walked the rest of the way to their destination in silence, so Nyx thought maybe Evra was going to let it go. But when they stopped outside the building, the Amazon said, “You’ve been home four weeks, Nyx. He has been gone for nearly eight months.”

Her heart squeezed.

“I promised, when I found you in the Shadow Market, that I would not expect you to be ‘normal’, and I do not. That is not what I am asking of you now. I am asking you to remember that you did things without him before, and that however harsh it may sound, you have a lifetime without him ahead.

“You know how to live on your own because you have done it before. So feel something without him now, because even if it is the wrong thing, it will be better than feeling nothing for the rest of your life.” She gestured at the city around them. “We are in a place rife with opportunity for making mistakes. Considering making one you will never have to see again.”

Nyx stared at Evra. “Did you just…tell me to have a one-night stand?”

Evra frowned. “I do not know what this ‘one-night stand’ is. I suggested you should have meaningless sex with a stranger.”