Page 49 of Now and Then

“I feel relieved,” she says. “But exhausted. Tonight was a lot.”

I thread my fingers into the back of her hair. “I bet, babe. But I’m glad you felt like you could let your friends all the way in.”

She nods against my chest. “It was time. Plus, if I’ve learned anything from Greer, it’s that we don’t always have to go through the hard shit alone.”

“You haven’t been alone, Sut,” I say. “I’ve been right here.”

“I know you have, but sometimes girls need girls.”

I chuckle. “Okay, that’s fair. But also . . .” I don’t want to sound like a selfish jerk. I’m happy that she’s at a place to open up to people, but after spending so many years being her person, I can’t help but be a little nervous that if she’s opening up to Greer and Navy, maybe she’ll no longer need to confide in me.

“Also what?” she prompts.

“It’s nothing. Just forget it.”

Sutton pulls away and looks me dead in the eye. “You know that won’t fly with me, right?”

“You didn’t say anything to me . . . you know, about being ready to tell them.”

I love the soft smile she gives me.

“I know,” she says. “I’m sorry. Things are changing so fast lately, and I’m not sure how to stop them or slow them down.”

“Do you want to stop them?” I rub my hands over her back, and she relaxes against my chest again.

“I’m—”

“Hey,” Luke says from the doorway, “you two coming inside or what?” He gives me a What are you two talking about? look.

“Yeah,” I say. “We’ll be right in.”

“You good, Sutton?” Luke’s eyes never leave mine.

She turns around and looks him right in the face. “Yeah, I’m okay, but . . . we should talk.”

Luke looks from her to me, confusion etched on every part of his face. “Yeah, okay, sure.” He sits on the patio chair and motions for Sutton to join him.

“You want me to stay?” I ask her.

Sutton smiles at me, resignation in her eyes. “No, I’m okay.”

Yet another thing in her life changing at warp speed.

I hold the back of her head and bend forward, placing a kiss on her temple. “I’m proud of you,” I whisper.

Inside the house, I grab a piece of blueberry pie from the counter and sit at the island. Navy and Greer post up next to me. We listen to the muted conversation drifting in from the patio, every rise and fall of Sutton’s voice pulling me back to the night of Sutton’s miscarriage—a night I’ve tried not to relive.

A sudden scrape of metal against concrete jerks me forward.

I look through the patio door just as Luke shoves his chair back and drops to one knee in front of his sister, gripping her hands like she might disappear if he lets go.

A lump forms in my throat. I know exactly how helpless he feels. Eventually, he sits back onto his heels, and they continue talking.

A lone tear drips down my cheek, and I swipe it away.

“You doing okay?” Navy’s voice cuts through the silence.

“Sure,” I say, “what makes you ask?”