Page 51 of Tumbling Hearts

“Yes. I’m not like you, who can stomach a dozen all at once.”

Gene flicks his hand. “Whatever, man. As long as you’re having fun.”

“Yeah, it’s been good. I know we just got done with a show, but I already can’t wait until the next one.”

“Same here. Maybe we could find some time to write again, soon? Just you and me.”

“For sure, I’d love that. We haven’t written anything new since before you left for California. I miss it. We really need to.”

“Have you had any sort of song on your mind? Like something bluesy, harder, or maybe like a ballad?”

“Y’know, honestly I don’t think we’ve done that many ballads.” Ray scratches his chin. “Though if we do write more, I think you should sing another on lead, Gene. Your voice sounds beautiful with the slower pace.”

“You think so?” He can feel his cheeks getting hotter.

“Yes, of course, I’ve told you before!” Ray grins. “But we should just feel the groove; if in the moment we’re feeling something more upbeat, we should go with that. But we’ll figure that out when we get there.”

“Yeah, definitely.”

“Ahem.”

Carol fake-coughs into her hand.

“What’s up, Carrie?” Ray asks nonchalantly.

“I thought if I didn’t speak up, you were going to completely ignore that I’m even here.”

“What? No, don’t think that, babe. I was just talking with Gene.” He puts a hand on Carol’s shoulder, making Gene’s stomach churn.

“I bet if I just let you guys keep talking, though, you’d just run off with him and forget me, leaving me by myself.” She frowns.

“I wouldn’t do that, babe. What makes you think that?”

“You did it on the Fourth of July.”

Ray lifts his hand off her, running his fingers through his bangs. “Look, we don’t need to relate it to that, okay? That was something else. Me just talking to my best friend for a few minutes shouldn’t bother you.”

Carol sighs, folding her arms in front of her chest. “I wouldn’t normally be bothered with that. But something just feels off. I don’t know. Maybe I’m thinking too much.”

“You are, babe. Hey, maybe we should go back to the room, okay? Wind down a bit.”

She shakes her head, shrugging. “Fine, yeah. That sounds good.”

“I’ll catch you later, Gene.” Ray gives him a smile, but it doesn’t meet his eyes. No, there’s something else there, something Gene can see if he looks closely. There’s an apology written in there. Maybe some other time, we can have time to ourselves.

That’s how it always is. Every single time. Ray doesn’t have to say the words aloud, but Gene knows what he means. Now isn’t the right time. Carol’s here. Everyone might get suspicious. We have to keep it a secret, otherwise our world as we know it will come crashing down.

I can’t be with you now, Gene.

“Yeah. See you, Ray.” Gene gives him a half-smile back.

What if that’s it?

What if I can never have him like that again?

He doesn’t want to think about it. If he does, he knows he might cry, and god forbid he make a fool out of himself right here in the hotel lounge. It’s not like this is the end of their friendship. Barely anything even happened. And besides, he and Ray will likely find another way to be alone, who knows? So he does his best to keep his cool, as he watches Ray leave with Carol.

He’d have a lot better time keeping his cool if he had something to smoke.