Page 164 of Over the Line

Yes. That was true. I needed to talk to Liam and figure out what our next move should be, and then⁠—

“Dad?”

I shook myself and looked up at Chris. “Hmm?”

He gestured toward the hospital room door. “Do you mind giving me a hand taking stuff down to the car?”

“Down to the—oh. Right.” I pushed myself up. “Are they discharging her already?”

“No, no, not until tomorrow. But it’ll be easier to take all this”—he pointed at the mountain of gifts people had sent—“now instead of waiting.”

“Good idea. Lead the way.”

We collected the balloons, bouquets, and everything else friends, family, and the Pittsburgh Phantoms had sent. We also collected anything Jasmine and the baby wouldn’t need between now and when she was discharged, and we headed down to the parking garage. When they were discharged tomorrow, all they’d have to wrangle was the suitcase and car seat.

After we’d loaded them into the car, we started back toward the elevator, but Chris halted. “Before we go back…” He chewed his lip.

I watched him, not sure where this was going. Given our tense conversations over the past few years, I was instantly nervous even though he wasn’t giving off any signals that I should be. Habit, I guess.

“I just wanted to say thanks.” He exhaled hard. “For calming me down before I got to her room. I was so panicked about getting here, I…”

“I know. That was, um, something I learned the hard way.”

His eyebrows shot up.

I rolled my shoulders. “I wasn’t the best partner for your mom when Nick and Ally were born. I thought I was being attentive and focused, but I didn’t realize I was just making her panic. She needed to lean on me. I needed to support her. But…” I shook my head.

“So, you freaking out made her freak out?”

Grimacing, I nodded. “Not my finest hour. And I know you didn’t want to be waylaid after you just flew in to be with Jasmine, but I⁠—”

“I get it,” he whispered. “I didn’t in the moment, but when I saw her and she fell apart…” He rubbed the back of his neck and sighed. “I knew you were right. And, um… I’m also really glad we fixed things.” He met my gaze, clearly fighting back his emotions. “No matter what happened in the past, I’m glad…” He hesitated, as if he didn’t quite know how to say what he was thinking, or he was afraid he’d start crying. Maybe both. Finally, he whispered, “I wouldn’t have wanted you to miss this, and I wouldn’t have wanted to miss it with my dad.”

Now I was the one on the verge of breaking down, and I didn’t trust my voice, so I just reeled my son into a fierce hug. Squeezing my eyes shut, I held him tight and his words settled in.

“I’m glad we fixed things, too,” I managed to say. “I got to see my son become a dad.”

My own words hit me harder than I expected. I didn’t fall apart, but as I let Chris go, there was no pretending I hadn’t teared up. Or that he hadn’t.

We both quietly wiped our eyes, and neither of us said anything more. I supposed nothing else needed to be said. Especially not when we were both threadbare from a long night with no sleep, and both overwhelmed with a lot of emotion. We’d said what needed to be said—the best thing was to just leave it.

On the way back upstairs, it occurred to me that maybe the silver lining to me learning so many things the hard way was that I could pass that wisdom on to my kids. Last night, my son had been a far better partner during the birth of his child than I’d been. As much as I would’ve given anything to go back and fix the fuckups of my past, that particular set of mistakes was easier to swallow now.

On the other side of that coin, though, was a fresh dose of guilt.

Sooner or later, I was either going to have to come clean to Chris or quietly let go of Liam.

If I wanted this newfound peace with my son to last…

If I wanted to have a role in my new grandson’s life…

I had a choice to make.

The day after Asher was born, shortly after we’d taken him and Jasmine home, Chris was on his way to the airport. Though he was still so exhausted he could barely stand, he was headed to Salt Lake City to rejoin is team for tomorrow’s game. I had no idea how he was going to function, but duty called. He kissed Jasmine and Asher, hugged me, and was out the door.

This sport waited for no one.

He’s really going to play tomorrow? Already?