Page 84 of Ethan

Instead, Ethan said, “Guess you should start asking Bo for some meditation recs.”

Hank laughed. “God, I guess so. Not that much has changed. I didn’t . . . um, last year. Either. Or this summer.”

Ethan had suspected that was true; they’d talked too much that if Hankhadhooked up with someone else, Ethan was pretty sure he’d have been able to tell. Even if Hank hadn’t told him, he’d have noticed the gap of it in the middle of everything else Hankwastelling him.

“Me either,” Ethan said. “And you know what that makes me?”

Hank hummed.

“Really fucking horny,” Ethan admitted.

“You could . . .” Hank took a deep breath. “If you wanted—”

“I don’t,” Ethan interrupted, because he knew what Hank was about to suggest and that wasn’t even an option. Not anymore. Not just because they’d almost gone on a date. Not because they’d kissed and shared a pair of orgasms. Because he didn’twantanyone else, and that had been true long before they’d met up for camp this fall.

“Okay,” Hank said, voice soothing. “I’m just saying, it’s an option, if you wanted.”

“It’s not,” Ethan retorted. “Not for me. Not anymore. Not for a long time. You’re who I want, and I’m not settling for less.”

Hank’s cheeks had gone pink. “Same.” He paused. “Besides, if you did, I might have to go AWOL and come down there, make sure you don’t fuck anyone else again.” He didn’t addever again, but the implication was there and it made Ethan feel all gooey inside.

“Oooooh, don’t tempt me with a good time,” Ethan teased.

“I mean it. Maybe . . .” Hank hesitated. “Maybe you’re notmine, not yet, but you’re mine. I wanna be yours. If I’d stayed in New York . . .”

“I know,” Ethan said softly.

Hank made a frustrated noise. “I hate this.”

“It kinda sucks,” Ethan agreed. “But it’s not gonna be forever. Not even close, okay? You’re gonna tear it up in Syracuse and then you’ll be back here, before you know it.”

“I’m gonna try,” Hank promised.

He didn’t have to say he was trying not just for himself, but for Ethan, for Ethan to know it was true, anyway.

Chapter 11

November

“Dude, who would’ve thought you’d end up being just as pathetic as me.”

The Black Knights had taken over the back of this bar, deep in this Massachusetts suburb, after they’d won the game against the Providence Bruins.

Usually, Hank got out of these kinds of things, because everyone knew he was antisocial, and now he had the good excuse that Bo also wasn’t going either.

But it was hard to dodge your own quasi-celebration.

Hard, but not impossible.

Which was why Trey, the Knights’ captain, had cornered him before they left the arena and insisted that he come tonight, and that he bring Bo with him. “What,” Hank had said, crabbier than he should’ve been, considering the Knights’ win/loss record and how he’d been contributing to that in a major kind of way, “you actually want to hang out with Bo now?”

Trey had grimaced. “Is he bringing his meditations?” Hank had only been able to laugh at that. “I’ll confiscate his earbuds first,” Hank had promised.

So, yeah, when Bo accused Hank of being equally pathetic . . . that would normally be aCome to Jesuskind of moment.

But what was he supposed to do? He was already doing everything he fucking could to get back to New York.

Doing less would be unacceptable.