Page 50 of Sucker Punch Drunk Love

Sierra

Thank god I’d been on a winning streak and had some cash stashed while I figured out this transition. The money would help keep me in a motel until I found another trainer, which shouldn't be too hard, considering the number of fights I’d won in the past few months.

I hadn't decided if I'd planned on taking the DaCosta fight with Vega, but his number had been ringing coming up on my phone screen nonstop since we talked. I knew I could walk into any gym with a decent number of female fighters and have them support me in my corner if I chose to. One thing was for certain, I didn't need theHouse of Beast, and I didn't need Josue Mendez.

Unfortunately, in the heat of our argument, I hadn't considered that a shit ton of things I left behind in his office, I had actuallyneeded, and given that I couldn't afford to replace any of it, I had to wait for a day I knew he wouldn't be there. I just hadn’t counted on running into Héctor.

“Hey, what's going on?” He met me with a friendly hug and smile. Unlike Josue, his energy was always welcoming, so I stuck around to chat. “Where have you been the past few days? Whenyou're gone, we just feel it. And smell it too, because you're the only one who comes with your own spray bottle,” he joked, which was true. What could I say? I hated smelling like sweat all day. “Everything okay? You doing good?”

Discomfort laced in my tone, I hated to disappoint him. “Yeah, but I think I'm gonna find a new gym to train at. The thing with me and Josue isn't really working out, and I wanted to find a new trainer while I'm still on people's radars,” I admitted as Héctor narrowed his eyes at me, crossing his arms at the chest.

“This wouldn't have to do with the fact that y’all fucking, does it?” he wondered, my mouth dropping at his consistent assumption. I wasn’t confirmingthat.

“He and I arenotfucking,” I lied, trying but failing to maintain eye contact.

“Sierra, I been knowing my man's twelve years, and he hasneverlost to me in a game of dominoes unless he's fucking. He doesn't maketimeto meet women. I'm smart, I just put two and two together. I won’t, however, judge you. But for real, you're really leaving, because what?”

“Things just didn't work out?” Fidgeting with my duffle bag’s shoulder strap, I shifted my gaze downward. “There’s actually more to it. I wasn't honest about something I should have been,” I hesitated. “I have a kid, and I knew that if he knew, he might not have been interested in training me. Especially after he turning me down the first time. Now we're at this place where we don't trust each other. Once that's lost, it's hard to get back.” Hector nodded, understanding.

“I see. Why don't I treat you to eat or something? We could talk more about it over lunch. You in a rush?” Hungry, I didn't want to pass up a free meal. Especially since I lost access to Cafe Josue, and returned to my regular meal plan. Translation, I ate when I ate.

“Sure, I have time,” I said, as he walked me out to his car.

***

He was nice enough to treat me to a fancy salad bar that aligned with my regimen, as he suggested we sat down to talk.

“You know, you don't have to tell me, but what's the deal with your kid? Why'd you want to keep that a secret?” I sighed, careful not to use too much of this fantastic creamy dressing.

“I don't know. My experience dealing with male trainers, a lot of them won't take you seriously. I learned that the hard way. That's why I stopped telling people. I don't hide it. I just don't tell anyone. But I guess to Josue that's the same thing,” I admitted, savoring the crunchy almonds in my salad.

“I can't really say he would have taken you on if he had known. His whole deal with female fighters has always been…I don't need to tell you that he feels like woman shouldn't be fighting. I'm sure he’s told you that many a times,” he said, slicing through his already cut steak in the salad with a knife that he asked to have steamed before he used it. If I didn't know any better, I'd say he had the ‘tism.

“Too many times to count.”

“You ever ask him why?” When I thought about it, I assumed it was because he thought men were superior. I never really asked if there was a deeper reason. I shook my head, hoping to get some insight.

“Do you know about his mom?” I took a deep breath. When he told me how she died, and that he witnessed it, I never really put the two together. But it made sense. I know if I had seen my mom die by the hands of another person, I probably wouldn't want to fight it at all. Just the fact that I survived abuse made me normalize making a career out of it, but if it was happening to, say my daughter, fighting wouldn't sound so appealing.

“Yeah, he told me about that. It sounded really tragic.” He shrugged.

“He's not gonna bring it up all the time, but I can tell that shit haunts him. It's not an excuse to be an asshole, but whether you were just fucking or headed toward something more, training you is going to trigger him sometimes. But I'm sure he'd get over the omission of you having a kid. He knows why you didn't tell him.” Another sigh.

“Well, I don't exactly have time for things to switch up. I definitely don't have it in me for bread crumbing, so for now I'm just gonna stay single. All these men out here act like they hate single moms. I'm not gonna pursue someone who feels like I should be lucky to be chosen because I'm a single mom or worse, choose someone who's made his stance perfectly clear where he stands with kids. Maybe we shouldn't have crossed that line. I guess I just… I don't knowwhatI thought. I just want enough money to get my daughter back. To hell with all this fucking other stuff,” I said, pushing the remainder of my salad around with the fork.

“He really cares about you, you know? He's got a passive way of showing it, but I know he wants you back. I think he was just hoping you'd just swallow your pride and come back home.” That was the thing. It wasn't my home, it was his. And as long as I was in pursuit of winning custody of my daughter, Josue and I could never be more.

“Yeah, well, if he wants me to wave the white flag, I might as well continue my journey with a new coach. I do miss his at-home Chipotle bowls, though. That man could actually cook,” I lamented, getting the rest of my food wrapped in a doggy bag, as Héctor covered the bill in cash.

“Well, thanks for kicking it with an old man. Learned lots of terms today I can use on my kids now,” he joked, and at just a few years older than Josue, he didn’t look it.

“Oh, come on, Héctor, you're not old.” Struggling to watch him stand, I almost choked on my words.

“Yeah, wait until you get to your 40s. The weather starts telling you how your joints feel, you start getting special inserts to stand all day, and all of a sudden you regret every time you rushed to the dance floor hearing the violins in the intro when you justhadto represent for the 99-2000.” I laughed.

“You know I was born in 2000, right?”

“Well, then you ain't never gonna know. Phew, I can link all my health problems on that era, and that eraalone,” he continued, as he offered to give me a ride home. Not wanting to spend a ninety-minute commute to get back to my motel, I accepted his gesture.