Page 30 of Bless This Hot Mess
Japheth frowned, kicking a loose rock, “Hmm… both, I guess?”
“Hmm… both, I guess,” Rebekkah echoed, sharing the sentiment. “It’s like that song,From a Distance.”
“Yes!” Japheth turned to Rebekkah, “Bette is so amazing on that song. She’s singing but it’s like she’s just talking to you, right?”
“Why can’t God do that? Like, just talk to us. We’re right here,” Rebekkah complained. “We’re all your instruments, marching in a common band. But we don’t know where we’re going! The flautist is running into the snare drummer and the whole brass section is like, who is leading this parade?”
“Exactly! And if God is watching us, God is watching us, God is watching us–she sings it like three times in every chorus. If He is watching us, why won’t He justtalkto us. Tell us what to do!” Japheth shook his head. “And why from a distance?”
“Like, get your Biblical butt down here! We need You!”
“Is it bad that I feel angry at Jesus?” Japheth admitted, his voice cracking. “A couple of nights ago, I had such a good prayer session, and IfeltHim, you know?Like He was inside me. It was… ecstasy. And because of that connection, I was sure we were finally on the right path. That our band was finally gonna start playing to a bigger audience.”
Rebekkah raised an eyebrow, “No more funerals?”
Japheth snorted, “I’ll always be grateful to Amigone Funeral Home. But yeah, playing for the living would be cool, too.”
Rebekkah smiled softly, “Feeling angry with Jesus is… complicated. I get it because I’ve been there too, especially lately, when our whole life just feels so upside-down. But I think we feel that way because we reallyloveHim. We have a relationship, and relationships are hard.”
“Especially when He’s the strong, silent type,” Japheth muttered.
Rebekkah chuckled, “There’s some guesswork involved in trying to understand what He wants. But I think all He really wants is for us to be good. To have great friendships, relationships with people in our community, and to step in, help, or just be there for others, you know?”
Japheth nodded thoughtfully, “We could climb the tallest mountain…”
“Or swim to the deepest seas,” Rebekkah added.
“But we can’t run from His love,” Japheth finished, a hint of resignation in his tone. He exhaled, feeling a little lighter. “I’m still confused. But I do feel a little better. Thank you.” He paused before asking, “What did you tell your mom?”
“Our mom-ager?” Rebekkah shrugged. “I didn’t.”
“You were just going to skip town?!”
“I mean… she can be a little much,” Rebekkah admitted.
“She’s our biggest cheerleader,” Japheth reminded her.
“And that’s alotof pressure,” Rebekkah replied, looking up at the darkening sky. “It’s like, if we don’t match AnneMurray, Juno win for Juno win, it’s never going to be enough.”
Japheth smirked, “I don’t think they have a category for Christian pop.”
Rebekkah’s eyes twinkled with mischief, “Yet!”
“Yet!” Japheth echoed, laughing. “Oh, I love how big you dream.”
“You, too.”
Their laughter was interrupted by a commotion near the ticket booth. A young man, small and muscular, was arguing with the ticket agent, his voice carrying over the bus terminal parking lot to the bench where Japheth and Rebekkah perched.
“Young man, there are no refunds when the bus is in the station,” the ticket agent said sternly.
“But I haven’t gotten on the bus!” Ronald snapped, his voice full of frustration. “I haven’t gone anywhere!”
The ticket agent shrugged, unapologetic, “I’m sorry, I don’t make the rules.”
Rebekkah squinted, trying to make out the figure causing the scene, “Is that…?”
“Ronald!” Japheth exclaimed, standing up and waving. “Hey, Ronald! It’s us, Japheth and Rebekkah–from, well, from yesterday!”
