Page 31 of Villains Never Die

Petty volleys between us that had us looking over our shoulders and questioning everything.

The following Thursday, I walked into the lobby of my building to a full-grown llama standing in the middle of the room and a very confused looking Gray.

“Why is this animal in my lobby?” I asked, already seething that there was one more day left in this week from hell.

Gray shrugged. “It was delivered this morning with that note.” He gestured to a collar around the llama’s neck. The creature chewed cud and shat on my shining floor. “Do you want me to find out who sent it?”

I approached the docile hairball and it didn’t move as I grasped its collar and read the note.

Are you fucking done yet?

“Forget about it.” I pinched the bridge of my nose. “Just get it the fuck out of here.”

I pulled out my phone as Gray did the same. I almost felt as bad for the llama left standing there as I did for myself.

This is low, even for you.

Rook: We can keep playing this game or you can stop being a stubborn jackass. I kinda like it though. Are we flirting?

I am storing homicidal rage for when our truce is over.

Rook: Sorry, no expiration date for that.

If you think I’m going to put up with your shite forever…

Rook: You could try being nice to me instead.

I don’t do nice.

Rook: Did you know that the petting zoo will let you rent up to ten llamas at a time?

Do not send one more goddamn llama here.

Rook: Call off this little war and I’ll make sure you never see another llama again.

Bloody fucking unending hell! Fine.

Rook: Good boy, England.

I snapped my phone shut and pressed it to my forehead, reminding myself that we had agreed not to kill each other.

***

That was the end of our feud, and as days crept by, I missed it as much as I celebrated it. Rook was silent after that—no calls, no texts, no notes delivered to my building. His absence made me itchy in a way that was difficult to describe. Restless. More sleepless than usual.

My two mysterious contacts on Midnight Chat replied quickly this time.

OriginOfMagic

That information about Death comes from ‘Theories of Medieval Necromancy.’ You can cross-reference it against ‘Historical Deals With Death’ and ‘Silas’s Accounts of Death’s Whims.’

j-aust13

Why do you have it?

OriginOfMagic

I am a scholar. I study the roots of magic, how it functions, who has it, and who does not. I possess the largest collection on Death in the world.