Page 117 of Wear It Like a Crown

“What do you want?” René asked, thin and reedy. Maybe it was the time gap or maybe it was that Leo had grown into a different person—either way, he didn’t remember René ever sounding this… weak. Leo glanced at the man’s hands and fought the sick lurch of his stomach.

“What do I want?” he repeated slowly, pursing his lips in demonstrative thoughtfulness. Next to him, Nate crossed his arms in a way that brought out the bulging muscles of his biceps. “Hmm. That’s a good question, actually. Averygood question. How about we sit down for a little chat while we discuss the answer?”

René swallowed. Leo felt his smirk twist into something that tasted like triumph.

* * *

Need you home right now

That had been the extent of Leo’s message. Joshua had received it just as he’d paid for his purchases—crisps and salt sticks, beer, tequila, ice cream, frozen pizza. Everything that was needed for watching tonight’s semi-final, Brazil facing Germany. If Germany made it through, Tristan would prematurely take the betting crown and be unbearably smug about it.

When Joshua read Leo’s text, he nearly dropped his purchases and ran. It could mean anything, and knowing that Leo had led the charge on his two ex-clients today… Well, shit.

Joshua grabbed the bags in a hurry, hopped into the car he’d parked outside the shop and pushed the speed limit in a way he usually wouldn’t. Leaving everything in the car, he barged up the stairs to find Leo sitting cross-legged on his doorstep. As soon as their eyes met, Joshua breathed a sigh of relief at the wide, near-manic grin on Leo’s face.

Leo jumped to his feet, fisted one hand in the front of Joshua’s shirt and dragged him into a bruising kiss, already reaching for the zip of Joshua’s jeans. “Hi,” Joshua got out, and Leo swallowed the word, exchanged it for a wild laugh. Turning them around, he crowded Joshua back against the surface of the door, trapping him against the wood with his hips.

Fuck, they were still in the stairway, and it was sort of private with Joshua’s flat the only one on the top floor, but not a good idea. Probably.

Oh God, also, wait.Wait. Joshua needed to—Leo had just—he’d just come from confronting his past, and was he all right, was he really and truly all right? Was he?

With some difficulty, Joshua worked up enough of a will to turn his face away and breathe, hands gripping Leo’s shoulders to still him. “Leo,” he uttered. “Hey, are you okay? Is everything okay? Are you all right?”

It took a second, then Leo relaxed a little, tight-strung energy uncoiling under Joshua’s touch. “I’m all right, babe.” His voice was bright and airy, his earlier grin resonating in it. “I am soveryall right. Like, no one’s been this all right in the history of forever. I’m brilliant,and you’re brilliant, and everything is brilliant. Also, I love you a stupid amount, and I want younow. Get us in there.”

Jesus Christ, okay. Joshua fumbled the key out of his pocket as one of Leo’s hands slipped under his shirt, fingertips pressing into his stomach. “Need to make you a copy,” Joshua mumbled, not really thinking. “So you can let yourself in next time, wait for me inside, like, naked in my bed.”

Leo froze for an instant, then pushed himself even closer. “Outside,” he hissed. “Want you to ride me on your balcony.” Standing on his tiptoes, he rolled his hips against Joshua’s, and holy shit, Joshua needed a moment to recover. The backs of his lids were drenched in velvety black.

“Okay,” he said. “Okay, yes.” Blindly, he shoved the key into the lock and twisted, almost tripped when the door gave behind him. Together, they stumbled into the flat, still intertwined. Leo kicked the door shut behind them, walking Joshua towards the balcony, hands frantic as they tugged at the buttons of Joshua’s shirt.

“Are you really good?” Joshua remembered to ask. He forced his lids open to study Leo’s face. “This isn’t just, like, a displacement activity?”

Leo pulled back enough for a radiant grin. “A displacement activity? The fuck you talking about, love?”

“You know, when an animal is cornered, and then it kind of…” Joshua faltered at Leo’s raised eyebrows, at the plain amusement in his eyes. After a pause, Joshua finished with an uncertain, “Because you went to see—you know?”

“A displacement activity,” Leo repeated. His laugh was true. “No, Princey, I’m not a cornered animal, thanks. But…” While his laugh petered out, his eyes remained bright even as he continued. “About René and Jake. Yeah. Just, holy fuck, you should have seen theirfaces. I’d built them up to these larger-than-life shadows in my head, and they were just so weak. Pitiful, really. Such sad, sad humans. Fuck, they don’t even—they’reweak, babe. They can’t hold me. They have no fucking power over me.”

Free, Joshua thought—and yes, Leo did look free, like a weight had slipped off his shoulders.Theycan’t hold me.

“Love you,” he told Leo, and there was a short, pulsing moment while they simply grinned at each other.

With a violent tug, Leo got Joshua’s shirt open and dug his knuckles into the tattoo on Joshua’s hip. He leaned in, mouth against the shell of Joshua’s ear, words escaping in a warm rush. “Loveyou. Only ever want you to touch me, yeah? Be the only one who gets to touch you like this.”

“Yes,” Joshua managed. “Yes.”

Leo continued without missing a beat, his voice low and firm. “Because you’re nothing like them,we’renothing like them, and this is—fuck, everything. You’re everything.”

In response, Joshua tangled both hands in Leo’s hair and roped him back in for another deep kiss. He went easily when Leo nudged him further back towards the balcony.

“Did you mean it?” Leo asked later. They were sprawled naked on Joshua’s outdoor bed, the afghan thrown haphazardly over their cooling bodies to protect them from the breeze, skin tacky with sweat and lube and come.

“Probably,” Joshua replied. “Which part in particular?”

“The thing with the key.”

Oh.