Page 114 of Wear It Like a Crown

“But I sort of did,” Joshua protested, and Leo sent him an indulgent look.

“You really didn’t, darling.” Directing his attention back at the screen, Leo steeled himself. The low quality of the stream made it difficult to assess the reactions of Carole, Ben and George. “Anyway, back to your question. There are two regulars who are likely to recognise me. Other than that, it was one-time things, usually with bad lighting, often with alcohol involved, and a minimum of six years ago. I think the risk is…”—again, he cleared his throat even though his mouth was dry—“manageable.”

“We’ll need names and addresses of your regulars,” Ben inserted, business-like. “See what kind of dirt we can find on them.”

“Nate will handle that part,” James said.

Leaning further into Joshua’s side, Leo slotted his fingers into the gaps between Joshua’s, his knee pressed against Nate’s. “I was seventeen.” The words were reluctant to leave his mouth, but he pushed them out all the same. “My first time with one of them I was only seventeen, so that’s definitely illegal. The commercial aspect, that is. More so for himthan for me.”

“Jesus fuck, Leo.” Ben sounded a cross between shocked and disbelieving, and Leo shook his head, staring directly at the screen.

“Don’t, okay? I’m not proud of the whole thing, but I certainly don’t want your pity. Or your disapproval. It is what it is.”

At that, Joshua’s fingers clenched around Leo’s. A quick sideways glance revealed that Joshua looked guilty and miserable. Did he believe it washisfault that Leo had to go through this whole messy ordeal, come clean with the team? Leo squeezed back.

The small gap in the discussion was broken by Carole. Her voice was gentle and slightly careful, but devoid of judgment. Not for the first time, Leo wondered just how much of her story resembled his own. “What about the street kids?” she asked. “The ones you see on Saturdays. Do they know?”

“I’m sure they suspect I was one of them,” Leo told her. “But not the sex work bit, no. And as for when I was actually doing that, I was… discreet, mostly. It’s not like I worked the kerb, you know. I picked clients up in bars, chatted with them for a while, so it probably looked like regular fun.”

“Which bars?” James asked.

“Switched it up.” Leo paused and let himself remember some of the places—dim lights, crowded, the air tasting of sweat and beer, his leather jacket the only armour that protected him. “I didn’t work any of those places enough for anyone to notice and throw me out. With the exception of one that belongs to my friend Kylie now. It belonged to her parents at the time, and she’s… a good person. Helped me out a fair bit.”

“I like her,” Carole contributed, and right; they’d met when she’d filled in for Leo last Saturday. “I don’t think she’s the kind to blab.”

“She’s not,” Leo said.

“Still, let’s assume that one of your old contacts goes to the press. Maybe with just a suspicion.” James set down his pen and leaned back in his chair, lacing his hands on the table. “What do we do?”

“Sue them into oblivion,” Ben said. “Unless there’s proof.”

Of course that would be his choice course of action, Leo thought with distant amusement. Bloody lawyers. “They won’t have proof,” he said out loud. “Thereisno proof. I was careful. Always thought that if I make it out, in a later life, that I didn’t want to become susceptible toblackmail.” He snorted. “Didn’t realise it’d have to withstand this scale of public attention, though.”

“I’m sorry,” Joshua whispered, and Leo bumped him with his elbow.

“Shut it,” he whispered back. “It’s about time I stop hiding. Go big or go home, right?”

The moment it was out he realised that he meant every word; while the low-level buzz of unease still quivered in his stomach, his ribcage had widened, and he felt lighter somehow, like a knot had come loose.

George spoke up for the first time. “In addition, between James and myself, we have the network to hear about any such story before it runs. There’s a good chance we could stop it.”

“And,” James added, “Nate can figure out the source so we can make sure they will think twice about talking to the press in the future.”

Shifting against Leo’s side, Nate gave a humourless smile. “It’d be my pleasure. I mean, everyone has some dirt they’d rather not see exposed to their friends and family, so… yeah.”

“Whoa,” Tristan breathed out, more admiration than disapproval. “Mate, remind me not to get on your bad side, like, ever.”

While Mo stayed quiet, he’d tipped his head back to study Nate with quiet, fond understanding. Nate met his gaze, and his smile twisted into something more genuine as he added, “As for what happens online, that doesn’t really matter without proof. It’s just chatter. Which, by the way—I already set up a few sock puppets for Joshua’s coming out. Guess we could use those.”

“Leo,” James said, low and serious. “It’s your call. Are you ready to do this?”

Swallowing around what felt like a rough-edged lump in his throat, Leo turned his head to look at Joshua. For a moment, their gazes held, Joshua’s eyes clear and his expression calm, fingers sure around Leo’s own.

“I’m ready,” Leo said out loud, repeated it. “I’m ready.”

He didn’t avert his eyes, and Joshua didn’t look away either.

It was strangely quiet once everyone had left the suite.