Page 100 of Wear It Like a Crown

Once the sky started to brighten, he rolled out of bed, pulled on a pair of swim shorts and padded out onto the private terrace to watch the sun rise. So. Saturday. In London, Leo was probably picking up the van, determined to help out a bunch of street kids because he knew what it was like.

Jesus. Of course he’d lashed out at some of Joshua’s comments. He must have seen himself in them, felt under attack each time Joshua didn’t quite know how to voice his thoughts, and if Leo really was in love with Joshua… It must have hurt.

Joshua had never intended to hurt Leo, but that didn’t mean he hadn’t. At some point—when things weren’t quite this fresh, weren’t quite this painful—he’d apologise. And then he’d let it go.

In the quiet of the new day, the ringing of Joshua’s phone seemed shrill, out of place. He considered ignoring it where it lay on his bedside table, the screen glowing bright in the still-shadowed room, easy to make out through the windowpane.

What if it was important, though? He sighed and pushed away from the railing.

Ever since his interview had aired, he’d made certain to keep his phone nearby and charged at all times. Just in case. So far there’d been no emergency, and the big fallout he’d feared hadn’t come. Some nasty comments, yes, but—well. While he could do without them, they didn’t cause tangible damage. There had been no economic impact, not one threat of secession by a Commonwealth member. Those driving Scotland’s independence referendum had even made it a point to reaffirmthat an independent Scotland would seek membership of the Commonwealth.

He snatched the phone, checked the display—and froze.

Leo.

That was Leo.

Why was Leo calling him?

Sitting down on the bed, Joshua felt his blood crawl through his veins at a hypnotic pace, slowing everything down. The room was as paralysed as Joshua himself, his thoughts like building blocks, angular and monotone.Why was—with the way they’d parted—why would Leo… Why. How, why. Leo. Why now. Leo.

Only when the ringing stopped did Joshua abruptly snap back to himself. He gave it a few seconds, long enough for Leo to end the call, before he called back.

Leo picked up on the first ring, with a low, oddly breathless, “Josh.”

“Hi.” It was one word, just one word, but it took a conscious effort for Joshua to push it out. His lungs squeezed down on his heart and made thinking difficult. The morning felt cool on his bare skin.

A gap followed, and Joshua could hear Leo inhale on a hissed intake of air. When he spoke, it was just as low as before, shaky. “You picked up. I, um.” Another gap. “I was wondering if you’d see me.”

Nothing made sense. Joshua’s head was a minefield.

“What do you mean?” he asked—too soft and affected, bordering on helpless. Twisting his fingers into the duvet, he tried to ground himself and stared out of the window at the endless expanse of the sky.

“Like…” Leo cleared his throat. “I’d like to talk to you. Right now?”

Nothing made sense. Shaking his head, Joshua squeezed his eyes shut. “Leo, I’m in Brazil.”

“I know.” Leo gave a wet laugh. “So am I.”

What?

“What?” Joshua whispered.

“I’m downstairs.” Again, Leo cleared his throat, gaining just a hint more confidence. “Copacabana Palace, right? I’m in the lobby. Nate as well. They won’t let us up unless you tell them it’s okay.”

Joshua clambered to his feet, pressed the phone to his ear and tried to still the rush of blood to his feet. Leo was… here? Why would… Leo was in Brazil? InBrazil? Half a day after Joshua had arrived?

Flattening one hand against the windowpane, Joshua tested out the words. “You’re here.”

“That’s what I just said.” Sudden humour glinted in Leo’s voice. He still sounded small and uncertain, but there was a newfound brightness to it, a teasing edge that was so familiar it made Joshua feel vaguely sick to the stomach. “Do try to keep up, little prince. Now, if you could convince these nice people here that I am no danger to your virtue…” Leo paused. “Well.Then again.”

Joshua barely heard him. “You flew toBrazil?”

“I…” For just a moment, Leo’s composure failed. “Yeah. I did.”

“To see me,” Joshua said, not really a question.Leo was here. That had to mean—he’d changed his mind. He wouldn’t have flown twelve hours just to break Joshua’s heart all over again. Would he?

“Actually, I figured if you threw me out, I could at least say I’d seen the giant Jesus statue.” Then Leo sighed, all humour draining away to make room for quiet sincerity. “Sorry, stupid defence mechanism right there. It’s—I am here for you. Yeah. If you’ll see me. If you…” The shortest of breaks. “If you’ll have me.”