Page 139 of Wallflower

“Areyouokay? You don’t have to do anything you aren’t ready for either.”

“Yeah…” he mutters, “actually, no.”

Ripley turns off the main road, entering the long winding driveway to Bleakcrest. Before reaching the main gate, he pulls off to the side, parking beneath the shade.

“Talk to me,” I encourage.

Distress is scrawled across his face and I don’t know how to make it better. His eyes look to the sky, refusing to meet mine.

“I don’t know how.”

“Okay, so don’t.”

“What?”

“If you don’t want to tell me what’s bothering you, you don’t have to.”

“I want to tell you, but I don’t know how.”

The walls around my heart fissure and fracture. What has he been through that he can’t properly convey how he’s feeling? I’ll dig as much as he allows to uncover the truth, but not right now. “That’s okay. We can figure it out. Did I upset you?”

He nods.What the fuck?

“Was it something I said?”

He shrugs.

“Ripley, look at me.” Reluctantly, he does. “Do you want to be alone?”

“No,” he whispers.

“Did I make you sad?” Trying to detangle this mess of feelings inside him is going to be a Herculean feat.

“You make me feel too many things, and I don’t know how to deal with it…I don’t know what it means.”

“Okay…” My expression falls as I try to decipher the well of shit he just popped the top off of.

“Fuck,” he huffs. “I’m sorry, Rose.”

“For what?”

“Bringing you down.”

“What? You didn’t.”

“Tell that to your face.”

“This is my thinking face.”

“Oh, yeah, whatcha thinking about?” His face lifts when he directs the conversation away from himself, and I burn with the need to see him crack one of those full blown smiles.

“You, obviously.” Maybe if I lay some of my emotions on the line, it will help him figure out his own. “How safe you make me feel. How happy, horny, and alive I am when you’re near.”

“Horny, eh?”

“Of course that’s what you’d focus on.” He throws that lazy, cocky grin at me, and I do, in fact, melt into a puddle of arousal. “I want you to know that whatever this is between us, it’s enough. I don’t need anything. I’m happy. Are you?”

“Yes, most of the time.”