Page 49 of The Mismatch

Holly was sniffing another dog in the distance.

She put her phone in her pocket and wrapped her arms tightly around her body.

‘Sorry, I was miles away.’ She said the words but could feel the hollowness around them. Knew she couldn’t pretend to be calm anymore. She often felt this bubbling in her chest,like if she didn’t vent to someone she would explode. Her hands were itching to get her phone back out of her pocket, to reply to Parvin, to text Oliver, to throw this hot potato of information around until it was no longer just her burden, until the pain was spread around.

‘Hey, you OK?’ She could tell even though Magnus was trying to help her, he was also distracted by the sight of Holly leaping about in the distance. ‘Hold on one minute,’ he said, before running over to break up a dog fight, dragging Holly back with him. ‘Probably time to take her home anyway.’

They walked in silence. Soraya was aware she should say something, but her brain couldn’t figure out what exactly, what a normal thing to say would be. All she could think was that this news was hopeless for her dad, who wasn’t even stabilising; he just made himself worse and worse.

After Holly had been fed, they sat together on the sofa, next to the cat which was curled in a ball. Soraya absent-mindedly stroked him as he purred contentedly.

‘What’s up?’ Magnus said, putting his forefinger beneath her chin, lifting her face so he could see her better.

She let out a shaky breath that surprised her.

‘Family stuff,’ she said. ‘My dad isn’t really well … it’s quite difficult to explain.’ She knew from past experience that when she said this people tended not to push further, accepting an ambiguous explanation of her dad’s medical condition.

Magnus didn’t surprise her.

‘Ah,’ he said. ‘I’m sorry. Do you want to talk about it?’

She shook her head.

‘What can we do to cheer you up?’ He gave her a tentative smile, which made her heart jump.

‘I don’t know. Whenever me or Oliver are upset about something we put on a playlist we made on Spotify, with songs that either cheer us up or relate to how we’re feeling.’

‘You’re really close with him, aren’t you?’

‘Yeah, he’s my best friend. Probably the only friend I’ve ever had that I’ve been able to be truly myself with.’

‘Why couldn’t you be yourself with friends before?’

‘My Brighton friends didn’t really ever understand why I grew up the way I did. Oliver instantly got it. His parents don’t really understand him either. They still don’t accept him being gay, you know, they think they can fix it somehow. It’s pretty fucked up.’

‘Really fucked up.’ There was a short silence before Magnus said suddenly, ‘Let’s see this playlist then.’

She took out her phone and handed it to him.

‘Robyn.’ He nodded in approval. ‘Pitbull? Flo Rida?’ He laughed. ‘What are these guys doing here?’

She folded her arms defensively. ‘They’ve produced some of the best feel-good songs of our generation.’

He barked out a laugh, pulling her into a hug. ‘Whatever you say, Ms Nazari.’ He kissed her head. Still hugging her, he put on ‘Fireball’ by Pitbull. She began to laugh. ‘I don’t ever want you to be sad,’ he said into her ear. She drew back then, looking into his earnest eyes, which contrasted so markedly to the upbeat music.

She felt something else bubbling within her and knew she had fallen for him. It was too late now to fight it. She leant into kiss him, expecting a quick peck in return, but it was surprisingly tender, loving even. He put both his hands to her face as she wrapped her arms around his neck. When they stopped kissing, he rested his forehead against hers for a moment. This felt more intimate than anything they had done before.

‘You’re really special to me, you know that?’ he said.

‘I …’ She stopped herself from continuing. ‘You’re pretty special yourself.’

CHAPTER 23

Soraya

London, 2014

They were meant to meet at Peckhamplex thirty minutes ago. Magnus still hadn’t arrived. Soraya stood in a cinema lobby that was now almost empty. She had two tickets forGone Girlin her hand.