Page 47 of Let's Kiss and Tell

“I literally asked once.”

“We’re .2 miles away,” she says, looking at the map on her phone.

We continue driving, and in the near distance I see a breathtaking ranch surrounded by trees and anOpen Housesign smacked right in the front.

My foot releases on the gas. “What is this?”

“Just park right here.” Lucy directs to an open spot a few houses ahead.

I do as she says. “An open house?”

“What’s a better way to jump into a relationship than house hunting?” she says, quite proud of herself I might add.

Looking at houses flares a slight feeling of PTSD. I think Julia and I looked at upward of eighty homes during our time together. None of it was fun, and house hunting is probably thebestway to test a relationship. There’s no easier way to start an argument thantalking about where you’d want to spend the next fifteen years living and how much money you’re willing to pay for it.

“We couldn’t look atapartments? Or houses torent?” I gaze ahead at what’s probably over two thousand square feet of property in one of the nicest areas of Pasadena. “I can tell you right now this house is out of our budget.”

“Suspend your disbelief, Marshall.” Lucy opens the door. “Come on.”

I step out of the car and reluctantly follow. It’s a beautiful day. Perfectly sunny and nowhere near the scorching temperatures from last week. There’s also a drastic difference from the overcast and chill in the air from a few hours ago.

“I think you’re romanticizing the idea of house hunting,” I say.

“Am I?” Lucy asks. “Or are couples romanticizing it?”

“What’s the angle of this story?” I frown.

“Well, from my readers’ perspective, I just started dating averydreamy guy.” She lowers her sunglasses and unsuccessfully tries to get a reaction. “At this point in the relationship, we’re getting to know each other, spending a lot of time together, and now we’re talking about moving in together.”

“After a couple weeks?”

“Exactly,” Lucy says. “The point being that people rush into relationships just because they found someone. They think that the next step is meeting their parents, moving in together, getting engaged, having babies, all those things.” Lucy stops and pivots in my direction. “Do couples really want these things or are they just doing it because they think they need to?”

I suddenly feel accurately psychoanalyzed right now.

“I went through all this,” I say, “and it was the most stress inducing thing I’ve ever done.”

Lucy stops short, looks at me. “You own a house?”

“Yeah,” I say, not mentioning that Julia and my mompressured me into it a few years ago and that I pretty much live paycheck to paycheck because of it.

“Oh.” She turns her focus ahead and starts walking.

“What?”

“Nothing.” She waves a hand.

“No, tell me.”

“I’m just…” She hesitates. “I’m sorry for saying all of that. If I knew you and Julia bought—”

“Don’t be sorry,” I say. “You’re right.”

She leaves it at that, and we walk up the gravel driveway. “So, what I’m doing is writing about this from a very excited perspective, but once we break up, people will be able to look back and see all the mistakes we made.”

“Have I thanked you for not using my name in this piece?”

“Not today you haven’t.” She looks up at me, a wide grin on her face.