Page 174 of The Witch Queen

I hesitate. Explaining about Margaret will mean telling Joan about Callen as well. About the methods I’ve used to control this court for the last three years.

Don’t,that voice urges.DON’T.

But where has its guidance ever led me? To a lifetime filled with self-doubt and isolation. This time, I follow a different instinct.

“Callen and Parnell cut out her heart and put it in a mirror,” I say. “Just like I did to the king.”

Joan gapes at me. “You didwhat?”

As briefly as possible, I tell Joan the real story about the night I broke the Veil. How I bound myself to Malum and gained my ability to control the shadows. My plan to wreak vengeance on the covens by robbing them of their magic. Joan listens without speaking, but her body tenses with each admission. When I finally finish, she’s quiet for a long time, the silence broken only by the distant sounds of the pyre being erected.

“So it was you,” she says at last. “The whole time. You wanted the war. Wanted Riven to become…what it is now. You lied about everything.”

There’s no rage, or even accusation, in her tone, which is somehow worse than if she was shouting at me. “Yes.”

“She didn’t totally lie about the covens,” Jacquetta adds. “They—we—were never interested in peace. We wanted to destroy Ayleth as much as she did us.”

“And the rest of us?” Joan asks. “People likeme? Where did we fit in?”

“I…” The truth tastes bitter. “I don’t know.”

She nods. The seconds drag on, each one heavier than the last. And I wouldn’t blame Joan if she turned around and never looked back. Marched me to the pyre herself.

“Well,” she says at last. “I suppose I can’t exactly be throwing stones in this situation.”

“What do you mean?”

“I knew what would happen when the Veil fell,” she replies. “Or I had a pretty good idea of it. I still helped you. And I’m not an idiot. I could have discovered the truth about all of this if I’d looked hard enough. I didn’t. Because it was easier to ignore it. What does that say about me?”

Jacquetta and I share a look. What a mess we’ve all made.

“No one is blaming you, Joan,” I say.

“I am,” she returns simply. “But I’m also willing to do something about it. And that’s not going to happen if we remain here for much longer.”

It’s not forgiveness, but it’s not rejection, either. For now, that’s about as much as I can hope for.

“More than anything, we need to find Blodwyn,” I say. “After what we saw at the last battle, the creature will be looking for her. Callen as well.”

I’d like to believe that the king wouldn’t harm his own daughter, but I’m not convinced.

“Do you have any idea where she might have gone?” Joan asks.

I shake my head. The princess has only ever lived at the palace and Margaret’s estate. Where could she have—

Margaret.

My attention pivots to the duchess, her silver eyes shining in the dim light.

“The mirror,” I murmur.

“What about it?” Jacquetta asks.

“From what Parnell explained, Margaret’s heart is inside Callen’s body,” I say. “Butheis still connected to the mirror. Which means she might be as well. And she might share the mirror’s abilities. Except…”

I gesture helplessly at the empty place on the wall where the mirror used to hang.

“It’s gone,” Jacquetta observes.