Page 139 of The Witch Queen

“If you’ve come to chastise me, I won’t hear it,” I say, turning one of my rings. “You saw for yourself: Jacquetta schemed with Margaret behind my back. She intends to use the covens to destroy me.”

Joan is quiet for a moment. “Are you sure that’s what she wants?”

“Of course I am,” I scoff. “It’s the same thing she did when we served Queen Sybil.”

And I curse myself yet again for falling into her trap.

“From what I understand, when you served as maidens, Jacquetta had you arrested for being a witch,” Joan says. “Yesterday, she didn’t even hint at what you are.”

Her words carry an uncomfortable amount of truth. Joan is right. Jacquetta had multiple opportunities to reveal my identity—with Margaret, at the party. Even now, in the dungeons, she can say whatever she wants. Why hasn’t she?

It doesn’t matter,the shadows seem to whisper.She betrayed you.

“I’m done trying to guess her reasons,” I say, shrugging away Joan’s pesky logic. “We’re going to do things my way for once.”

“For once?” Joan laughs. “We’ve been doing thingsyour waysince all this started. Breaking the Veil. Taking the throne. Going to war.”

She counts the list off on her fingers and I bristle.

“It’s what you wanted, too,” I remind her. “We agreed that Riven needed to change. You said yourself—the covens are out of control. They have to be stopped.”

“I said that when I believed the covens sent that creature here,” Joan presses. “Somehow, I don’t think Jacquetta is responsible for that. Perhaps the others aren’t, either.”

Heat flames in my cheeks. I go to a sideboard and pour myself a glass of wine, then drain half of it in one gulp. “She’s responsible for the Mines.”

“Yes, and our army caused just as much chaos and destruction,” she returns. “How much longer is this going to continue?”

As long as it takes,that voice insists.Until they’re all dust.

“Jacquetta isn’t who you think she is,” I say, as much to myself as to Joan. “She—”

“I’m sure you both have very impressive wounds to display. But whatever happened in the past, I know you still care for her. You wouldn’t be this angry if you didn’t.”

“The wayyoucared for Anora?” I retort. “Did that make any difference in the end? She still left you.”

Joan flinches. Part of me recoils at my own cruelty, but I don’t take it back.

“Believe what you like,” she says softly. “But ask yourself: Is your victory really worth the price you will pay to achieve it?”

No.That wretched part of my heart aches.Not when it’s her.

“I will payanyprice,” I answer in a hiss. “And if you can’t stomach that fact, then maybe you should leave court.”

Joan holds my gaze a long moment.

“I will, if that’s your wish,” she says. “But if you keep pushing people away, who’s going to be left? I’m your friend, Ayleth. So is Jacquetta. I hope you start to realize that.”

Her words twist like a blade inside me, but I refuse to acknowledge the pain.

“You hope too much.”

She shakes her head. “There’s no such thing as too much hope. It’s some of the most powerful magic there is. Like love.”

That feckless chamber of my heart pulses to life again.

I seal it off and turn my back on Joan. A moment later, she calls Fitz and they leave. I let them go, ignoring every instinct urging me to stop her. Because I don’t need anyone on my side. Not when I have the shadows.

“No such thing as too much hope.” A voice sing-songs. “Like love.”