Page 105 of I Hope This Finds You Well

Armin’s gaze flashes toward Garret, who is emerging from an office with his ears perked toward us, before he pulls closer to me. “Okay, fine—I’m going to pop out. Was trying to be subtle, but you’re blowing it for me here, Jolene.”

He takes another step toward the elevator, and I return the favor by stepping in front of him again.

“Come on, Jolene.” Now he’s getting loud.

“If you leave, you’ll lose your job. Gregory is setting you up.”

Garret’s eyes widen as he pretends to look at a folder while standing in the middle of the hall.

I turn his way. “How’s that folder coming, Garret?”

He snaps it closed and stalks off to his desk.

I make myself tall, getting in Armin’s face. “Rhonda is going to notice.”

He lets out a huff. “Well, everyone’s watching us now anyway. So I guess that’s that. I’m going regardless.” He takes a step closer to the elevator, then stops. His eyes soften as he turns back to me. “You know, this weekend at dinner, when you asked me if lying was the right thing to do, you were right.”

I shake my head a little too hard. He’s going to ruin everything for himself. “No, I wasn’t,” I say. “I was just thinking out loud. It wasn’t even about you; I was projecting!” My voice has a panicked hitch in it I could do without.

Armin shakes his head. “I’m starting to wonder if any of this matters anymore. My mom is sick, and I’m tired of lying. Every day, all she wants to talk about is the wedding. This isn’t how I want to spend the rest of our time together.”

My hand darts out to squeeze his wrist, automatic and abrupt. “You’re not thinking straight. We can still help your mom.” Both our eyes dart to my hand grabbing him. I quickly retreat as flames radiate up my face.

Armin says his next words lower. “Jolene, are you... Is lying, reading people’s emails, everything, maybe getting to you?” He tilts his head. “This job might not be worth what it’s doing to you, you know? Life is—”

“I’mfine!” My voice takes an unfortunate squeal. “Things are finally going good now.” Armin drops his eyes to the floor as words scramble on the tip of my tongue, as I will myself to find the right thing to say. “The truth isn’t always the best policy. You knew that when you chose to lie.”

Armin’s shoulders drop, but it’s the plea in his gaze that stops me in my tracks. “You know what appointment I’m going to today?” he asks. “We’re talking to a lawyer about afterlife things. Ihaveto be there. It’s more important than this crap job.” His words come out in a choke.

“Oh.” My chest constricts. What am I doing? “I—okay. You’re right. Go. I’ll cover for you.”

The realization is like a deflation. He doesn’t need this job like I do.

“Wish your mom well for me.”

“We’ll talk later.” He half smiles as he walks away.

When I make it back to the pods, Rhonda’s emerging from the boardroom and heading to her desk. Her gaze shifts to all the empty cubicles before zeroing in on Armin’s.

She has no idea that the only job she should be worried about is her own.

What’s going to happen to her? She doesn’t have a son who can look after her. Her Silver Timings matches always come up short. Just like me, this job has always been all she had.

And it’s like a reflex. I don’t know what I’m going to say as I walk over. “Knock-knock,” I murmur, tapping on the wall of her cube. Rhonda jostles in her chair to look at me, smiling. “Can I come in?”

“How can I help, dear?”

It’s an excellent question. I stare blankly at her before blurting out, “I’m just thinking about the next Morale Boosters event.”

Rhonda’s face drops. “Unfortunately, it looks like things are quite slow for a while on that front.” Her cheeks pull down, the empty weekends and evenings stacking up against us.

“Maybe we can come up with something to do then? Like I heard you talking about a book club?”

Rhonda’s voice is hollow. “I don’t think anyone was interested in that idea.” Then she tilts her head toward me, curious. “Do you read?”

“Not really. But I don’t thinkreadingis, like, the main point.”

“Of a book club?” Rhonda looks at me with sincere confusion. Then her shoulders drop. “I know what you’re trying do.” It’s the meek way she holds herself that tugs at me. “Don’t worry. I’m not that lone—”